I wouldn't try harder to remove the relay , chances are it's soldered onto the board. I have one circuit board the has both removable and soldered relays mounted.
If you can shut down all power and remove the board , you may be able to find a radio shop to replace the relay, particularly if there are any part numbers on it.
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99DSDP 3884, Freightliner, XC, CAT 3126B, 300 HP /ALLISON 3060
2000 Caravan toad, Remco & Blue Ox.
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