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Old 01-04-2016, 06:43 AM   #1
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Location: Pensacola, FL
Posts: 116
A lot of short one liners

In a Podiatrist's office:
>>>>>> "Time wounds all heels."

>>>>>>

>>>>>>

>>>>>> ************

>>>>>> On a Septic Tank Truck:

>>>>>> Yesterday's Meals on Wheels

>>>>>>

>>>>>>

>>>>>> **************************

>>>>>> At an Optometrist's Office:

>>>>>> "If you don't see what you're looking for,

>>>>>> you've come to the right place."

>>>>>>

>>>>>>

>>>>>> **************************

>>>>>> On a Plumber's truck:

>>>>>> "We repair what your husband fixed."

>>>>>>

>>>>>>

>>>>>> **************************

>>>>>> On another Plumber's truck:

>>>>>> "Don't sleep with a drip.

>>>>>> Call your plumber."

>>>>>>

>>>>>>

>>>>>> **************************

>>>>>> At a Tire Shop in Milwaukee :

>>>>>> "Invite us to your next blowout."

>>>>>> **************************

>>>>>>

>>>>>> On an Electrician's truck:

>>>>>> "Let us remove your shorts."

>>>>>>

>>>>>>

>>>>>> **************************

>>>>>> In a Non-smoking Area:

>>>>>> "If we see smoke, we will assume you

>>>>>> are on fire and take appropriate action."

>>>>>>

>>>>>>

>>>>>> **************************

>>>>>> On a Maternity Room door:

>>>>>> "Push. Push. Push."

>>>>>>

>>>>>>

>>>>>> **************************

>>>>>> At a Car Dealership:

>>>>>> "The best way to get back on your feet

>>>>>> - miss a car payment."

>>>>>>

>>>>>>

>>>>>> **************************

>>>>>> Outside a Muffler Shop:

>>>>>> "No appointment necessary.

>>>>>> We hear you coming."

>>>>>>

>>>>>>

>>>>>> **************************

>>>>>> In a Veterinarian's

>>>>>> waiting room:

>>>>>> "Be back in 5 minutes.

>>>>>> Sit! Stay!"

>>>>>>

>>>>>>

>>>>>> **************************

>>>>>> At the Electric Company

>>>>>> "We would be delighted if you

>>>>>> send in your payment.

>>>>>> However, if you don't, you will be de-lighted."

>>>>>>

>>>>>>

>>>>>> **************************

>>>>>> In a Restaurant window:

>>>>>> "Don't stand there and be hungry;

>>>>>> come on in and get fed up."

>>>>>>

>>>>>>

>>>>>> **************************

>>>>>> In the front yard of a Funeral Home:

>>>>>> "Drive carefully. We'll wait."

>>>>>>

>>>>>>

>>>>>> **************************

>>>>>> At a Propane Filling Station:

>>>>>> "Thank heaven for little grills."

>>>>>>

>>>>>>

>>>>>> **************************

>>>>>> And don't forget the sign at a

>>>>>> CHICAGO RADIATOR SHOP:

>>>>>> "Best place in town to take a leak."

>>>>>>

>>>>>>

>>>>>> **************************

>>>>>> And the best one for last...

>>>>>> Sign on the back of another

>>>>>> Septic Tank Truck:

>>>>>> "Caution - This Truck is full

>>>>>> of Political Promises"
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Old 01-04-2016, 06:50 AM   #2
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A lot of short one liners

Sign at my local hardware store in the handicapped parking spot.
If you're not disabled when you park here , you will be when you leave here.
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Old 01-04-2016, 07:06 AM   #3
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Not real funny, but cute.
Sign on a septic truck:

We want your stinkin' business
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Old 01-06-2016, 10:49 PM   #4
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Slogan on septic truck: Number 1 in the number 2 business.

Slogan on septic truck: Takin' your crap since 1989.
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Old 01-07-2016, 05:46 AM   #5
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At a tattoo parlor, "Tattoos while you wait"
At a dry cleaner, " Drop your pants here"
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