April 15th-The Taxman Cometh

[apackof2]

Taxation with representation ain't so hot either. (Gerald Barzan)

As a taxpayer, you are required to be fully in compliance with the United States Tax Code, which is currently the size and weight of the
BudweiserClydesdales. (Dave Barry)

Anyone who's ever filed a tax return or visited the Department of Motor Vehicles understands that government does two things well: spend our money and waste our time. (Ed Feulner)

I'm proud to be paying taxes in the United States. The only thing is - I could be just as proud for half the money. (Arthur Godfrey)

Unquestionably, there is progress. The average American now pays out twice as much in taxes as he formerly got in wages. (H.L. Mencken)

Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys.
(P.J. O'Rourke)

Government does not tax to get the money it needs; government always finds a need for the money it gets. (Ronald Reagan)

The taxpayer - that's someone who works for the federal government but doesn't have to take a civil service examination. (Ronald Reagan)

If you make any money, the government shoves you in the creek once a year with it in your pockets, and all that don't get wet you can keep. (Will Rogers)

I don't know if I can live on my income or not -the government won't let me try it. (Bob Thaves)

The IRS has a special toll-free number for persons having problems figuring their tax forms. It's designed especially for those who like to listen to busy signals. (Pat Williams/Ken Hussar)


The Beatles

Let me tell you how it will be
There's one for you, nineteen for me
'Cause I'm the taxman, yeah, I'm the taxman

Should five per cent appear too small
Be thankful I don't take it all
'Cause I'm the taxman, yeah I'm the taxman

If you drive a car, I'll tax the street,
If you try to sit, I'll tax your seat.
If you get too cold I'll tax the heat,
If you take a walk, I'll tax your feet.

Don't ask me what I want it for
If you don't want to pay some more
'Cause I'm the taxman, yeah, I'm the taxman

Now my advice for those who die
Declare the pennies on your eyes
'Cause I'm the taxman, yeah, I'm the taxman
And you're working for no one but me.

(its in the joke forum but its not really funny-taxes )

[apackof2]

Taxation with representation ain't so hot either. (Gerald Barzan)

As a taxpayer, you are required to be fully in compliance with the United States Tax Code, which is currently the size and weight of the
BudweiserClydesdales. (Dave Barry)

Anyone who's ever filed a tax return or visited the Department of Motor Vehicles understands that government does two things well: spend our money and waste our time. (Ed Feulner)

I'm proud to be paying taxes in the United States. The only thing is - I could be just as proud for half the money. (Arthur Godfrey)

Unquestionably, there is progress. The average American now pays out twice as much in taxes as he formerly got in wages. (H.L. Mencken)

Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys.
(P.J. O'Rourke)

Government does not tax to get the money it needs; government always finds a need for the money it gets. (Ronald Reagan)

The taxpayer - that's someone who works for the federal government but doesn't have to take a civil service examination. (Ronald Reagan)

If you make any money, the government shoves you in the creek once a year with it in your pockets, and all that don't get wet you can keep. (Will Rogers)

I don't know if I can live on my income or not -the government won't let me try it. (Bob Thaves)

The IRS has a special toll-free number for persons having problems figuring their tax forms. It's designed especially for those who like to listen to busy signals. (Pat Williams/Ken Hussar)


The Beatles

Let me tell you how it will be
There's one for you, nineteen for me
'Cause I'm the taxman, yeah, I'm the taxman

Should five per cent appear too small
Be thankful I don't take it all
'Cause I'm the taxman, yeah I'm the taxman

If you drive a car, I'll tax the street,
If you try to sit, I'll tax your seat.
If you get too cold I'll tax the heat,
If you take a walk, I'll tax your feet.

Don't ask me what I want it for
If you don't want to pay some more
'Cause I'm the taxman, yeah, I'm the taxman

Now my advice for those who die
Declare the pennies on your eyes
'Cause I'm the taxman, yeah, I'm the taxman
And you're working for no one but me.

(its in the joke forum but its not really funny-taxes )