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Old 06-28-2014, 09:51 AM   #1
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Do you speak southern?

Southernese 101



A possum is a flat animal that sleeps in the middle of the road.

There are 5,000 types of snakes and 4,998 of them live in the South.

There are 10,000 types of spiders. All 10,000 of them live in the South, plus a couple no one's seen before.

If it grows, it'll stick ya. If it crawls, it'll bite cha.

Onced and Twiced are words.

It is not a shopping cart, it is a buggy!

Jawl-P? means, Did you all go to the bathroom?

People actually grow, eat and like okra.

Fixinto is one word. It means I'm going to do that.

There is no such thing as lunch. There is only dinner and then there's supper.

Iced tea is appropriate for all meals and you start drinking it when you're two. We do like a little tea with our sugar. It is referred to as the Wine of the South.

Backwards and forwards means I know everything about you.

The word jeet is actually a question meaning, 'Did you eat?'

You don't have to wear a watch, because it doesn't matter what time it is, you work until you're done or it's too dark to see.

You don't PUSH buttons, you MASH em.


Ya'll is singular. All ya'll is plural.

All the festivals across the state are named after a fruit, vegetable, grain, insect, or
animal.


You carry jumper cables in your car - for your OWN car.

You only own five spices: salt, pepper, mustard, Tabasco and ketchup.

The local papers cover national and international news on one page, but require 6 pages for local high school sports, the motor sports, and gossip.

Everyone you meet is a Honey, Sugar, Miss(first name) or Mr.(first name)

You think that the first day of deer season is a national holiday.

You know what a hissyfit is..

Fried catfish is the other white meat.

We don't need no dang Driver's Ed. If our mama says we can drive, we can drive!!!


OOPS! This should have been put under RV Humor!
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Old 06-28-2014, 10:21 AM   #2
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You forgot "cutchee" It's what a knife will do to you...ie. "Watch that knife...it's sharp. It'll cutchee."
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Old 06-28-2014, 10:36 AM   #3
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Joe,
I've read similar humorous takeoffs on speaking Southern, but that one may be the most accurate one yet. And yes, I've lived down here pert near all my life.
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Old 06-28-2014, 10:41 AM   #4
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Thanks, Joe. I needed that information.

We're currently in Grand Prairie, Alberta on our way to the Yukon and Alaska for two months.

Our travelling companions are two fine couples from Georgia. There's almost a language barrier between Georgia and Saskatchewan...I'm kidding of course!
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Old 06-28-2014, 11:07 AM   #5
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I'm in NC and begginn to understand some of the locals some of the time. However they don't understand Bronxese .
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Old 06-28-2014, 11:20 AM   #6
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We have friends in the CG we winter in from New England and some from Alabama or Bama. Some of the Alabama folks friends came to visit and had a real good Southern drawl. I actually had to translate Southern to New England and vice versa. Over a "few" beers we had a great time Y'all. Being from NY helped with one and living in Florida half the year the other.
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Old 06-28-2014, 01:33 PM   #7
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Ya'll come!

Don't be a stranger, you hear!

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Old 06-28-2014, 08:06 PM   #8
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Our famous last words Hey Yall watch this
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Old 06-28-2014, 08:20 PM   #9
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bless his heart, poor thang
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Old 06-28-2014, 08:23 PM   #10
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I like this one "I don't care to do it", translated to Yankee "sure, no problem". First time I ran into it I was taken back, thought I had a personnel problem. I finally asked "are you saying you don't mind doing it".
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Old 06-30-2014, 01:29 PM   #11
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Y'all just remember when you come down here.....

The gators have the right of way.



"A possum is a flat animal that sleeps in the middle of the road.

The same is true of the Armadillo.
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Old 06-30-2014, 01:49 PM   #12
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Rodneykrantz View Post
Our famous last words Hey Yall watch this
I heard it was, "Hey, hold my beer and watch this."
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Old 06-30-2014, 03:03 PM   #13
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If you're from Texas an armadillo is called possum on the half shell.

All armadillo's sleep on their backs with their feet straight into the air.

If you eat possum on the half shell it takes two. One to eat and one to watch for traffic.

We are both Yankee's but have lived in AR for 35 years and love it. A person can't help where they were born. But you can move if you so desire.

Our Son is a LT Col in the AF, with 4 college degrees works in the Pentagon and still says that Ya'all is a great word. If you want to get everybody's attention in a big gathering it works. "Hey Ya'all listen up."

I was born in PA and their/our word for Y'all is You-uns.

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Old 06-30-2014, 03:13 PM   #14
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Clifftall View Post
I'm in NC and begginn to understand some of the locals some of the time. However they don't understand Bronxese .
They are still trying to figure if you are a Yankee or a D*mn Yankee. A Yankee just visits or is passing thru. A D*mn Yankee decides to stay.
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