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Old 02-04-2016, 06:24 PM   #1
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Grounds for divorce

GROUNDS FOR DIVORCE

A judge was interviewing a woman regarding her pending divorce, and asked, "What are the grounds for your divorce?

She replied, "About four acres and a nice little home in the middle of the property with a stream running by.

"No," he said, "I mean what is the foundation of this case?

"It is made of concrete, brick and mortar," she responded.

"I mean," he continued, "What are your relations like?

"I have an aunt and uncle living here in town, and so do my husband's parents.

The judge said, "Do you have a real grudge?

"No," she replied, "We have a two-car carport and have never really needed one.

"Please," he tried again, "is there any infidelity in your marriage?

"Yes, both my son and daughter have stereo sets. We don't necessarily like the music, but the answer to your questions is yes.

"Ma'am, does your husband ever beat you up?

"Yes," she responded, "about twice a week he gets up earlier than I do.

Finally, in frustration, the judge asked, "Lady, why do you want a divorce?

"Oh, I don't want a divorce," she replied. "I've never wanted a divorce. My husband does. He said he can't communicate with me."
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Old 02-04-2016, 07:15 PM   #2
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Sounds like my wife with her loss of memory!!
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Old 02-04-2016, 10:11 PM   #3
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That's worth repeating. If I can remember it!
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Old 02-06-2016, 10:44 AM   #4
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Old 02-06-2016, 10:51 AM   #5
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Hear Ye...Hear Ye...Hear Ye....Divorce granted!
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Old 02-06-2016, 11:12 AM   #6
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Originally Posted by TonyDi View Post
That's worth repeating. If I can remember it!
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Old 02-06-2016, 12:21 PM   #7
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I just emailed it to the DW...upstairs on her IPad. Any minute now I should be hearing from upstairs "Your a "A" hole".
Now that's communicating
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Old 02-06-2016, 12:41 PM   #8
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my wife sits to my right at dinner, while driving, when watching television, at church and sleep to my right. That is why I am deaf in my right ear.
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Old 02-06-2016, 02:19 PM   #9
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I'm deaf in my right ear since birth and I tell the DW that is why I was a virgin until we got married.
I'd be dancing with a girl, she'd say something, I'd say Huh? and then she would say forget it!!
Same thing in my convertible.
For some reason she doesn't believe me!! (I can't win!)
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