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05-25-2016, 10:48 AM
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#1
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Senior Member/RVM #90
Monaco Owners Club
Join Date: Nov 2002
Location: Columbus, MS
Posts: 54,794
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How about some lawyer jokes
There were three men, a Hindu man, a Muslim man, and a Lawyer traveling together when they realized that they were lost. They were quickly running out of daylight. As the sun began to set, they found themselves at a remote farm house, so they knocked on the front door and asked the farmer if they could spend the night with him. He told them that in his home, he only had room for two of them, the other one would have to sleep in the barn.
The Hindu man said that he could sleep in the barn and so off he went. Soon there was another knock on the door. The Hindu man was standing there and said, "I can't sleep in the barn, there's a cow in there, and I can't sleep under the same roof with a cow."
The Muslim man said, "OK, I'll sleep in the barn." After a very short time had passed, there was another knock on the door. The Muslim man was standing there and said, "I can't sleep in the barn, there's a pig in there, I can't sleep under the same roof with a pig."
"Fine!" said the lawyer, "I'll sleep in the barn" and so off he went. There was soon some commotion and another knock at the door, and there at the front door stood the cow and the pig.
__________________
Joe & Annette
Sometimes I sits and thinks, sometimes I just sits.....
2002 Monaco Windsor 40PBT, 2013 Honda CRV AWD
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05-25-2016, 11:02 AM
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#2
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Registered User
Triple E Owners Club Ford Super Duty Owner
Join Date: Apr 2013
Posts: 1,745
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A high profile case was being heard in a small town.
A witness was a little old lady.
The defense lawyer asked her if she knew him? She said yes, your the lawyer with the drinking problem who cheats on your wife.
He quickly asks if she knows the prosecuting lawyer? She replies yes he was the one who embezzled thousands from the justice system.
The judge called the two lawyers up to the bench and warned them that if either of the two idiots asked her about him. He would send them both to the electric chair.
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05-25-2016, 12:03 PM
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#3
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Senior Member/RVM #90
Monaco Owners Club
Join Date: Nov 2002
Location: Columbus, MS
Posts: 54,794
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Quote:
Originally Posted by narampa
A high profile case was being heard in a small town.
A witness was a little old lady.
The defense lawyer asked her if she knew him? She said yes, your the lawyer with the drinking problem who cheats on your wife.
He quickly asks if she knows the prosecuting lawyer? She replies yes he was the one who embezzled thousands from the justice system.
The judge called the two lawyers up to the bench and warned them that if either of the two idiots asked her about him. He would send them both to the electric chair.
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__________________
Joe & Annette
Sometimes I sits and thinks, sometimes I just sits.....
2002 Monaco Windsor 40PBT, 2013 Honda CRV AWD
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05-25-2016, 12:09 PM
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#4
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Senior Member
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: Watertown NY USA
Posts: 6,531
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If it wasn't for lawyers you'd never need one.
Lynn
__________________
2002 Fleetwood Storm 30H on Workhorse P32 chassis 8.1 gas.
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05-25-2016, 12:17 PM
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#5
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Senior Member
Join Date: May 2015
Posts: 679
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Lawyers ARE a joke. Need proof? Just look at what most politicians were before they became politicians. Lawyers!
Politicians are the biggest joke of all.
I rest my case!
Grumpy 
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05-25-2016, 12:57 PM
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#6
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Senior Member
Fleetwood Owners Club Ford Super Duty Owner
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: SoCal
Posts: 15,749
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What do you call 50 lawyers at the bottom of the ocean??
A good start...
__________________
Vince and Susan
2011 Tiffin Phaeton 40QTH (Cummins ISC/Freightliner)
Flat towing a modified 2005 Jeep (Rubicon Wrangler)
Previously a 2002 Fleetwood Pace Arrow 37A and a 1995 Safari Trek 2830.
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05-25-2016, 12:58 PM
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#7
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Senior Member
Fleetwood Owners Club Ford Super Duty Owner
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: SoCal
Posts: 15,749
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I read that researchers are now using lawyers instead of rats for lab experiments. Come to find out there are some things they can't get a rat to do...
__________________
Vince and Susan
2011 Tiffin Phaeton 40QTH (Cummins ISC/Freightliner)
Flat towing a modified 2005 Jeep (Rubicon Wrangler)
Previously a 2002 Fleetwood Pace Arrow 37A and a 1995 Safari Trek 2830.
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05-25-2016, 01:56 PM
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#8
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Senior Member/RVM #90
Monaco Owners Club
Join Date: Nov 2002
Location: Columbus, MS
Posts: 54,794
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Q: What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 100?
A: Your Honor.
Q: What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 50
A: Senator.
__________________
Joe & Annette
Sometimes I sits and thinks, sometimes I just sits.....
2002 Monaco Windsor 40PBT, 2013 Honda CRV AWD
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05-25-2016, 02:06 PM
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#9
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Registered User
Triple E Owners Club Ford Super Duty Owner
Join Date: Apr 2013
Posts: 1,745
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Quote:
Originally Posted by grumpy0374
Lawyers ARE a joke. Need proof? Just look at what most politicians were before they became politicians. Lawyers!
Politicians are the biggest joke of all.
I rest my case!
Grumpy |
 : thumb:
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05-26-2016, 06:27 AM
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#10
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Senior Member
Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: Cinnaminson, NJ
Posts: 286
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95% of lawyers give the other 5% a bad name.
2014 Thor Palazzo 35.1
Sent from my iPhone using iRV2 - RV Forum
__________________
GlennD
2014 THOR PALAZZO 35.1
2015 Equinox Toad
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05-28-2016, 02:28 AM
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#11
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Senior Member
Triple E Owners Club
Join Date: Aug 2000
Location: Richmond, B.C., Canada
Posts: 140
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Our local university research laboratory is going to use lawyers instead of rats for ongoing studies. Apparently they found that there were somethings that rats would not do!
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05-28-2016, 03:33 AM
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#12
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Senior Member
Join Date: Jul 2011
Posts: 350
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Why do sharks not bite lawyers?
Professional courtesy.
__________________
Dave and Holly
2011 Winnebago Sightseer 33c with a 2011 Honda CRV behind. 
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05-28-2016, 03:42 AM
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#13
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Senior Member
Solo Rvers Club iRV2 No Limits Club
Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: Yuma County, AZ
Posts: 10,869
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What group is worse than lawyers? Insurance adjusters! I used to blame lawyers for many of society's problems until I was in an auto accident that wasn't my fault.
__________________
Barb (RVM18) with Morkies Lily & Bebe RIP Sena FMCA#F466348
"Homer" ‘11 Shasta Cynara, pulling "Ranger" '97 Ford Ranger toad
The Journey is Our Destination. Full-timer May 2011 - July 2021
[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
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05-28-2016, 07:17 AM
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#14
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Senior Member
American Coach Owners Club
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 344
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There are only about 4 lawyer jokes. The rest are true stories.
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