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Old 05-13-2013, 01:36 PM   #1
Fleetwood Owners Club
iRV2 No Limits Club
Join Date: Jan 2013
Posts: 99
How I got my education

I have heard these a time or two

Why I Owe My Mother ....

1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.

"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning."

2. My mother taught me RELIGION.

"You better pray that will come out of the carpet."

3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.

"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!"

4. My mother taught me LOGIC.

"Because I said so, that's why."

5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC.

"If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me."

6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.

"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."

7. My mother taught me IRONY.

"Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about."

8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.

"Shut your mouth and eat your supper."

9. My mother taught me about CONTORTION-ISM.

"Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck?"

10. My mother taught me about STAMINA

"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."

11. My mother taught me about WEATHER.

"This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."

12. My mothertaught me about HYPOCRISY.

"If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"

13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.

"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."

14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.

"Stop acting like your father!"

15. My mother taught me about ENVY.

"There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do."

16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION.

"Just wait until we get home."

17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING

"You are going to get it when you get home!"

18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.

"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to get stuck that way."

19. My mother taught me ESP.

"Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"

20. My mother taught me HUMOR.

"When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me."

21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.

"If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."

22. My mother taught me GENETICS.

"You're just like your father."

23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS.

"Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"

24. My mother taught me WISDOM.

"When you get to be my age, you'll understand."

And my favorite:

25. My mother taught me about JUSTICE.

"One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you!"

Only you folks my age understand these profound statements!!!

But, there is one missing from this list~~My personal all-time favorite!!

My mother taught me about CHOICE.

"Do you want me to stop this car?"

Charles R. Dean

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Old 05-13-2013, 03:22 PM   #2
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Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: Indiana
Posts: 2,016
Funny! I don't rember you being in my house when I was growing up but you certainly must have been listening in some how.

Paul, Kathy, and Tux a 4 month Mini Schnauzer
2014 Tiffin Phaeton 42 LH, 2013 Honda CRV
"When the time comes to look back, make sure you'll like what you see"
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Old 05-13-2013, 03:34 PM   #3
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Holiday Rambler Owners Club
Join Date: Jun 2011
Posts: 4,568
Are you my brother?

"Don't make me come back there"

And no, we never ever had to "wait till your father gets home". Talk about double trouble.
Myron & Deborah
08 HR Endeavor 40 SKQ
2012 Ford Edge Limited FWD 3.5L
Aluminator tow bar, Demco base plate
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Old 05-13-2013, 10:58 PM   #4
Senior Member
Join Date: Jan 2000
Location: Bakersfield, Ca. U.S.A.
Posts: 386
Iwent to a Catholic school . When i got into trouble there I was spanked there, then by Mom when I got home, (and if it was bad enough by Dad ). It was always swift sure punishmet. I never heard "Wait till your father gets home."
99 F-350 4X4 PSD pulling a 24' Nash travel trailer
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Old 05-14-2013, 07:57 AM   #5
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Mid Atlantic Campers
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: PA
Posts: 39
I will always remember go get me switch in the woods and if it was'nt the right stick I got whatever was close to her hand.
2011 327RES
2003 2500 5.9 RAM DIESEL
2014 3500 DRW 6.7 DRW
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