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Old 03-19-2011, 11:38 AM   #15
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My bride's life outlook can best be described as follows:

"A woman should always spend more than her husband makes - It keeps him motivated."
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Old 03-19-2011, 12:06 PM   #16
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Is that similar to...

Last month a guy stole all my credit cards. So far he's spending less than my wife did, so I haven't reported it yet.
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Old 03-20-2011, 08:42 PM   #17
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DW and I live like that. She makes the small decisions and I make the big decisions. I decide what we should do about the Mid-East unrest, she decides what we eat, what we watch, what we do, etc.
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Old 03-20-2011, 09:01 PM   #18
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We both worked for a big company, so we thought in the term of big company.

When we got married she said so there would not be any big arguments I shall be the CEO of the marriage and she will be the treasurer and control the expenses. After 39 years of marriage I slowly realized that whenever I wanted to spend money I had to go to the treasurer for it. You don't call her slick for nothing.
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Old 03-20-2011, 09:03 PM   #19
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haha...2 funny....we decided a long time ago, what was his is his....mine is mine, & we both make the big & little decisions...been working for 7+ yrs
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Old 03-21-2011, 07:16 AM   #20
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Quote:
Originally Posted by lincoln30 View Post
We both worked for a big company, so we thought in the term of big company.

When we got married she said so there would not be any big arguments I shall be the CEO of the marriage and she will be the treasurer and control the expenses. After 39 years of marriage I slowly realized that whenever I wanted to spend money I had to go to the treasurer for it. You don't call her slick for nothing.
I had an aunt and uncle kind of like that. After they had been married for 30 years he told me, "When Glenna and I got married she had $7 and I had $5. And it's been that way ever since."
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Old 03-21-2011, 10:37 PM   #21
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I'm the boss in my family! Last night I had the wife on her knees begging. She said " Come out from under that bed and fight like a man"
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Old 03-22-2011, 12:10 AM   #22
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My friend asked me "Do you ever wake up cranky in the morning?"

I answered "No, I let her sleep as late as she wants"
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Old 03-22-2011, 08:05 AM   #23
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The secret to the success of our marriage is, once a week we go out for a nice dinner at an interesting restaurant... good food, good wine. I usually go on Tuesdays, she goes on Fridays.
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Old 03-22-2011, 08:39 AM   #24
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These responses have me ROTHFLMAO. Great thread.

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Old 03-22-2011, 09:54 PM   #25
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I did remodeling for many years.I always said my job was to satisfy other men's wives. If the wife was happy the husband was happy.
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Old 03-23-2011, 03:41 AM   #26
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A man and wife go into the dentist's office, the man says doc, I need to be out on the golf course with my buddies at 10am, it's 930am now, can you just get rid of this tooth, it's painful, but being in a hurry I want you to just pull it without novocaine, I can't afford to wait---and the dentist is amazed and says to the guy "I've been a dentist for twenty years and never saw such courage in my entire career! Which tooth is it, sir?"













and the guy turns to his wife and says "Honey, open your mouth and show him which tooth is bothering you".
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Old 03-26-2011, 07:56 AM   #27
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and the guy turns to his wife and says "Honey, open your mouth and show him which tooth is bothering you".
HAHAHAHAHA!!!!

When my dentist said he charged $125 to pull a tooth, I said, "That's a lot of money for 5 minutes work, isn't it?"

And he said, "Well, I can pull it real slow if you want..."
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Old 03-26-2011, 09:48 PM   #28
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Boy, do I know something about couple's decision making...

On our 19th wedding anniversary, my 1st wife received a nice little inheritance from a distant cousin, not huge but nice. Anyway, things got really nice around the house with all the yard work and pool maintenance being done and all.

Then all of a sudden one day she announces that "We need an extended vacation" and wants to go to Mexico for the summer. Cool! I go to work and give a two weeks notice. A week before I'm suppose to quit, I come home from work and nobody's home and all of her clothes are gone. Turns out 'We' (Juan Carlos the lawn guy, Andrej the pool guy and the wife) are down in Medico sipping libations. I was heart broken and down in the dumps for six months and there's no word from anyone.

Then, I get this certified letter with power of attorney to sell the MB-350 SL she had bought with part of her inheritance with instructions on where to send the proceeds. Didn't take long, the car sold in 4 days but I was getting mad and I damn well wasn't going to send her any money! But after about two weeks, I realized that all that resentment and hurt was only going to eat me alive...that in matters of the heart, there probably is no right or wrong...let by-gones be by-gones and all that crap....so I reluctantly wrote out a check for the twenty dollars I'd sold the car for and sent it to her. I hope she's happy.

The above is for entertainment purpose only, is largely pure fiction and I swear most is not true. Bob
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