Old Nebraska farmer
An 80-year-old Nebraska Farmer goes to the Mayo clinic in Rochester for a check-up.
The doctor is amazed at what good shape the guy is in and asks, 'How do you stay in such great physical condition?'
'I'm from Nebraska and in my spare time I like to hunt and fish says the old guy, "and that's why I'm in such good shape. I'm up well before daylight feeding cattle, mending fences, planting, baling hay, and when I'm not doing that, I'm out hunting or fishing.
In the evening, I have a beer and all is well."
"Well" says the doctor, "I'm sure that helps, but there's got to be more to it. How old was your father when he died?"
"Who said my Father's dead?"
The doctor is amazed. "You mean you're 80 years old and your father's still alive? How old is he?"
"He's 100 years old," says the old Nebraskan. "In fact he worked with and hunted with me this morning, and then we went to the topless bar for a while and had a little beer and that's why he's still alive. He's a Nebraska Farmer and he's a hunter and fisherman too."
"Well," the doctor says, "that's great, but I'm sure there's more to it than that. How about your father's father? How old was he when he died?"
"Who said my Grandpa's dead?'"
Stunned, the doctor asks, "you mean you're 80 years old and your grandfather's still alive?"
"He's 118 years old," says the man.
The doctor is getting frustrated at this point, "So, I guess he went hunting with you this morning too?"
"No, Grandpa couldn't go this morning because he's getting married today.'"
At this point the doctor is close to losing it. "Getting married!!...............???? Why would a 118 year-old guy want to get married?"
"Who said he wanted to?"