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Old 02-16-2013, 07:28 AM   #1
Senior Member
mgscott4's Avatar
Workhorse Chassis Owner
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Kansas City, MO./Pollock, LA.
Posts: 1,525

When chemists die,
they barium.

Jokes about German sausage are the wurst.

soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned

I know a guy who's addicted to brake fluid. He says he can
stop any time.

How does Moses make his tea? Hebrews it.

I stayed
up all night to see where the sun went. Than it dawned on me.

This girl
said she recognized me from the vegetarian club, but I'd never

I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. I can't put it

I did a theatrical performance about puns. It was a play on

They told me I had type A blood, but it was a Type-O.

dyslexic man walks into a bra.

Why were the Indians here first? They
had reservations.

Class trip to the Coca-Cola factory. I hope there's
no pop quiz.

Energizer bunny arrested. Charged with battery.

didn't like my beard at first. Then it grew on me.

How do you make holy
water? Boil the hell out of it!

Did you hear about the cross eyed
teacher who lost her job because shecouldn't control her pupils?

you get a bladder infection, urine trouble.

What does a clock do when
it's hungry? It goes back four seconds.

I wondered why the baseball was
getting bigger. Then it hit me !

Broken pencils are pointless.

tried to catch some fog. I mist.

What do you call a dinosaur with an
extensive vocabulary? A thesaurus.

England has no kidney bank, but it
does have a Liverpool.

I used to be a banker, but then I lost

I dropped out of communism class because of lousy

All the toilets in New York's police stations have been stolen.
Police have nothing to go on.

I got a job at a bakery because I kneaded

Haunted French pancakes give me the crepes.

Velcro - what
a rip off !

Cartoonist found dead in home. Details are

Venison for dinner? Oh deer !

Earthquake in Washington
obviously government's fault.

I used to think I was indecisive, but now
I'm not so sure.

Be kind to your dentist. He has fillings,

Never fall in love with a tennis player because to a tennis
player, love
means nothing.

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Old 02-16-2013, 11:04 AM   #2
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HTFireMedic's Avatar
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Hickory Tavern, SC
Posts: 258
How do you make holy
water? Boil the hell out of it!

My dad's a Methodist minister, one of his parishioners had gotten into an argument with a local Episcopal parishioner.
She argued that the Methodist Church was better at Baptism because dad "boiled the hell out of the water"!
Dad almost choked to death trying not to laugh!
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