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Old 04-06-2006, 08:23 AM   #1
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Woman: Would you get married again if I died?
Man: Definitely not!
Woman: Why not?..... Don't you like being married?
Man: Of course I do.
Woman: Then why wouldn't you remarry?
Man: Okay, I'd get married again.
Woman: You would? (With a hurtful look on her face)
Man: (audible groan)
Woman: Would you sleep with her in our bed?
Man: Where else would we sleep?
Woman: Would you put away my pictures, and replace them with pictures of her?
Man: That would seem like the proper thing to do.
Woman: And would you let her use my golf clubs?
Man: She can't use them...... she's left-handed.
Woman: (silence)
Man: (silence.....too late)
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Old 04-06-2006, 08:23 AM   #2
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Woman: Would you get married again if I died?
Man: Definitely not!
Woman: Why not?..... Don't you like being married?
Man: Of course I do.
Woman: Then why wouldn't you remarry?
Man: Okay, I'd get married again.
Woman: You would? (With a hurtful look on her face)
Man: (audible groan)
Woman: Would you sleep with her in our bed?
Man: Where else would we sleep?
Woman: Would you put away my pictures, and replace them with pictures of her?
Man: That would seem like the proper thing to do.
Woman: And would you let her use my golf clubs?
Man: She can't use them...... she's left-handed.
Woman: (silence)
Man: (silence.....too late)
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and sometimes I just sits. . . . .
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Old 04-06-2006, 09:00 AM   #3
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Old 04-06-2006, 09:47 AM   #4
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I'm kinda partial to Jeff Foxworthy's variant of this joke!

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Old 04-12-2006, 01:06 AM   #5
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Hey Rusty, When you gonna post Jeffs version?

See yall in the funnies, Warren
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Old 04-12-2006, 04:39 AM   #6
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Warren,

I don't think I can!!


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Old 04-12-2006, 05:53 AM   #7
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Rusty, Can`t you just use @&*# and such in certain places?

See yall in the funnies, Warren
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Old 04-12-2006, 07:23 AM   #8
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Warren,

I'll try, but I may get kicked out of here.

(Jeff and his wife have just gone to bed, and they are lying there quietly in the dark when the conversation starts as follows)

Mrs. Foxworthy: Jeff, if anything happened to me, would you get married again?

Jeff: (After considering that there's probably no right answer to this question and figuring that the following is what she wants to hear) Of course not, honey. After having had the best, there's just no way that anyone else could even compare.

Mrs. Foxworthy: Boo-hoo!!

Jeff: Honey, what's the matter?

Mrs. Foxworthy: Jeff, you need to remarry for the children's sake. The children need a mother.

Jeff: (After a respectful period of consideration) Ok, honey. For the sake of the children, I'd remarry. But just so they could have a mother.

(A period of about 5 minutes elapses.)

Jeff: Honey?

Mrs. Foxworthy: Yes, Jeff.

Jeff: I was just thinking. Do you think the kids would mind having a young, blonde stepmother with some big old *******?

(Jeff notes that things went downhill fast thereafter.)

Rusty
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Old 04-12-2006, 05:48 PM   #9
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HARHARHAR I don`t know bout this... I like em bofh. Thanks guys I got tears on my cheeks. I think I need to sit around some campfars real bad.

See yall in the funnies, Warren
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