I am not skirting any issue. I believe I have more than fully explained how I have analyzed the issue to my satisfaction. You apparently have concluded that exceeding any of the limits posted by the manufacturer is ALWAYS unsafe. I disagree.
I am not advising anyone to do anything. I am simply saying that I have analyzed the issue to the point that I have concluded to my satisfaction that I and my wife are "safe" driving our truck/trailer combination, with the modifications I have made. I do not view this as stupid, ignorant, irresponsible, or anything of that kind.
I have, and always will, live my life and make my decision to the extent I can by DECIDING MYSELF what is best for me and those around me within the allowable limits of the law. As has been noted by more than just me, I am not breaking any laws in doing so. And NO ONE has explained in any meaningful way how my actions have in any way jeopardized the safety of me, my wife or anyone else. As Wingnut60 has noted - "I have yet to see a case cited where there have been charges brought against an RVer over being at fault in an accident due to running beyond the mfgs weight limits--anyone know of one?" Try Googling the "most common causes of motor vehicles accidents". I did a quick search and found nothing to indicate "over loading" was anywhere near a common cause of accidents.
I have not taken my combo over Mt. Hood, but the Siskiyous, the Sanitam Pass, and the mountains in Western Montana are similar enough for comparison. I have never felt the truck was being "pushed around" by the trailer. And as I believe I have noted, both the wife and I have noticed that we are MORE comfortable hauling the 14,000 pound Cypress than the 10,500 pound (loaded numbers) Wildcat. It may be because of the Moreryde supsension and shocks on the Cypress, whereas the Wildcat had neither of those items. Regardless, I am clueless where you and others are coming from with the trailer "pushing" the truck around. It may be that different trailers tow differently. I don't know. All I know is that I haven't experienced it with my set up.
I have explained my experiences for all to consider to the extent they wish to. You have similarly explained your experiences. I suggest we leave it at that.