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Old 06-05-2011, 09:40 AM   #1
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My RV Holiday - First Days! (Humour)

It's funny. It's seems as though no matter how hard I try to have a successful holiday, my lifes calling for what is supposed to be a relaxing interlude from the day to day stress of the work-a-day world, ends up being plagued by incidents that would have the average person buckling at the knees to the point of raising their hands in the air and asking the Supreme Being "What is up Man"???

Now, maybe it's just me, or maybe it's just me that decides to put this stuff to word, but I find it hard to believe (or don't want to believe) that the kind of things that happen to me/us on holidays doesn't happen to others.

When I reflect on my day to day life, yes there are things that occur, but nothing profound enough or often enough that would necessitate the need to reflect on how many things happen that would culminate into the stories that I put to word.

Maybe I'm just too busy to notice the significance of the events that happen day to day and have the time to reflect on what happens when I'm on holidays.

It would almost bring one to pause and suggest that from now on, I should not be using the phrase "I'm going on Holidays", but rather aptly changing it to "I'm going on Calamity's"!!!

The anticipation for such would normally suggest to the average person, to not put themselves through the rigors of such events. However, either I don't see myself as average (which I like to think I'm not) or that I have an abnormal insensativity to the cloud that looms as soon as I decide to take some time off.

In any event, here's how it starts:

Day 1:

Today started like any other day getting prepared to go off on a new adventure.
I had done all the necessary things to get the boat ready to take with us the day before and parked it behind the RV. When I put the boat away the day before, I put all my hitch locks on and pulled the hinge pin on the swing away hitch and swung the hitch out of the way to make more room in the driveway. Satisfied, that I was ready for the next day and being that it was raining I went inside the house. Needing to get a few things for our trip, DW sent me on a grocery run to various places to pick up the things we needed.
Today, I went to move the boat to take the RV in for service. Took the hitch locks off, swung the hitch into place and when I went to install the pin and...you guessed it. I had put the hinge pin on my bumper the day before as I needed two hands to swing the hitch out of the way. Somewhere in our town is the hinge pin I lost while running errands the day before. Now I can't move the boat, had to cancel my RV appointment and started calling around to find a replacement pin.
Now, I love our little town, but with that comes the problems with a little town...Nobody stocks all the things you need. Ahhh, but after a couple of hours of phoning around, I find out that they do in the next city! So off I go and after 2.5 hours and $50 in gas, I have the answer to my prayers. All is good in my world (so I think).

Day 2:

Rain mixed with a few problems at work that had me emailing back and forth for several hours. You think you have everything prepared to go away and you find out that think doesn't mean is!

Day 3:

Rain

Day 4:

Ahhh, finally the adventure begins. All packed and the boat hooked up to the RV. I look at this thing I have created. I paced it off and I'm about to embark with what is nothing less than a 63 ft. train. From my mirrors looking back, it appears endless. This rig borders on needing an engineer's license and a conductor!
In any event, backed by more confidence than experience (maybe, dare I say brains) in commanding such a rig, we set our sites on our destination.
As with past holidays, I looked on the internet to search out where we would like to go. By all accounts, the Resort we chose appeared like Nirvana. The site showed it had a nice marina, sites right on the lake, a Bistro (restaurant). When we finally arrived, I found out that the marina had been taken over by another resort and wouldn't allow us to moor our boat there. They did say that I could beach my boat and that I was welcome to tie up to a tree as long as I had a rope long enough. I said "Pardon"???. Our boat has never seen a beach!
Further in my inquiries as to the resort's amenities, I was told that yes indeed, the resort has a world class Bistro with a noted Chef, however, it was not open till mid June.
I asked if we could purchase firewood. The girl at the desk said "Firewood? Oh no sir, we do not allow campfires at our resort, however, if you wanted, we sell gas fire-pits for $139.00 or we rent them for $10.00 per day". I asked if they sell propane tanks. She said "Propane tanks? Oh no sir but we can fill a tank if you have one". Thankfully, I thought, okay I have the propane tank from our barbecue we could use and walked over to look at the gas fire-pits. Their "Fire-pits" looked like something Bonnie uses to make a roast in. Only difference is it had a hose coming out the side. I said "I'll think about it".
I looked at the map of the lake front sites. All right on the water. It seemed like there may be some salvage to my choice to be here yet. I suggested that I would go pick one and report back on what would be our choice.
We drove down the road and yes, there were sites right on the lake and big enough for our RV, however, only if you sawed our rig in half and put the pieces side by side. It was obvious at this point that the dream we had lived for several weeks of lake front camping was not to be. We ended up in a different section of the resort. We still had a lake view though, as long as you stood on the picnic table and peered out over the lid of the over-filled garbage container strategically placed between a couple of trees.
The site was nice though. Lined with cedars for privacy from your neighbours. Full service hook-ups.
I got everything set up and got to the task of hooking up our sewer, water and power.
The week before we left, I had gotten a new blackwater cable put on the RV. I now unscrewed the cap on my sewer to hook up the sewer hose and to my shear horror, filled my water station compartment full of the most foul smelling conglomeration I had ever come across. You guess it...100% raw, unrefined sewage. Yes that's right. That nasty word nobody wants to say let alone have to deal with...sh-t!. It's obvious that the newly installed cable didn't close the gate valve. This is a BIG problem. Even more so when I noted that my rubber gloves, my savior from what would have made the handling of the situation a bit more bearable were layIng in the bottom of the compartment. Both DW and my daughter yelled out "What is that awful smell?" They thought our dog had dropped a bomb but couldn't find any evidence. I yelled out "Don't worry about it, I've got it under control!" Ya right, I think to myself. I felt like every camper in the resort now had their eyes on me as the smelly conglomeration glooped onto the ground. I quickly hooked up my water hose and washed down the compartment, hoses, controls and accumulated pile on the ground. In a few minutes, it was gonna be nothing more than just another memory ingrained in the annuls of my holiday experiences.
Shortly after, DW asked me if I wanted a drink. I said "yes". She said "are you ready to have dinner"? I said "Give me a few minutes"!!!!
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Old 06-05-2011, 10:25 AM   #2
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Change the names, to protect the guilty, and this could be me! Here I thought that I was unique with luck such as that!

I hope that things improve and become less 'noteworthy' and more relaxing

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Old 06-05-2011, 10:32 AM   #3
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dogpatch

Sounds like you need to relax more. I spent 30+ years in a high stress, high burnout field (restaurant management and ownership). I was and still am a Type A personality, but my DW has gotten me to relax and let things flow more. I used to be that if everything wasn't perfect I went nuts, now its better. I plan for the mishaps and try to midigate the extremes. Going camping is my relaxation. Once we are set up my only major responsibility is cooking the meals (I'm second chair on watching the kids). I have found more joy in life and I don't have the health issues I once did. By the way I'm over 55 and finally enjoying myself.

Relax and enjoy whatever comes your way. Sit in your folding chair and have a cold one and watch everyone else stress out.

Good Luck
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Old 06-05-2011, 06:26 PM   #4
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Unhappy

Went up to the lake this week to chill out. Our "tree lined" sight we were promised was taken so off to the hot back field we went. Got things hooked up, made a drink and got a lawn chair out to relax. The DW starts screaming and comes out of the coach slapping herself and jumping around. Seems we parked on a fire ant hill and now the coach is filled with angry fire ants. The CG doesn't have any ant spray but says they will get some. 3 hours later the office is closed and we go to a motel.....

The next day we return and still no ant spray from the CG. We go into town and buy spray but it just angers the fire ants even more. They now fill the motor home and are everywhere. We go back into town and buy flea bombs, roach bombs and any other ant killing stuff we can find. We set it all off in the MH and close it up and go back to the motel. Later that night we return and find most of the ants are gone but the whole MH is covered in a white dust which I suppose will kill us too. 3 hours of cleaning and killing more ants we go back to the motel.

The next day we check the MH only to find the water line in the bathroom has burst and the whole back of the MH is now filled with water (and floating ants) . It seems our "water pressure unit" didn't work as advertised. We borrow a wet vac from the CG and spend 4 hours cleaning up the mess but have to leave the doors and windows open to dry out the carpeting so in 94 degree heat we head back to the motel.

The next morning and our last day we go to the MH and find our GPS unit gone along with a few other things. At the CG office when they checked us out they actually said "We hope you had a nice stay! Come see us again"

You're not alone.....
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Old 06-06-2011, 06:00 AM   #5
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dogpatch, now you know where they got "S-it Happens" from. Glad you can still laugh about things.
Billieg, my DW would have gave up RVing if all that happen to her in one Weekend. First time we went to FL and after we set up she opened a compartment door and step on a nest of Fire Ants. Resort worker saw what happened and within seconds had pellets all over our site for the fire ants, but DW still had me looking for a different resort, bottom line we stayed and had a great time for the next 4 months. Met some great friends and people.
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Old 06-06-2011, 07:10 AM   #6
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My Holiday Experience - Day 5 (Humour)

The day started like any other day. Similar only in the fact that I woke up.
It was sunny though!
I went to brush my teeth and seize the day and couldn't find my shaving bag with all my travel bath accessories. I asked DW where she might have put it. She replied "I didn't see it". Having been with my wife for about 15 years, this usually means that she had it and put it somewhere and doesn't remember where she put it. This set in motion a search not unlike that of an FBI investigation. I tore apart the RV in search of the black bag and came up empty handed. Suddenly, my hopes and visions of looking like "Adonis of the Campground" were hopelessly dashed. Now, I know that most of you out there wonder what my secret is for looking and smelling the way I do when you see me (be nice now) but, the secret is simple and can be described in one word..."Product".
I know most of you guys will never admit it, but if we all laid our shaving kits on the table exposed for the world to see, I can bet there would be a cornucopia of products in there that would make most women envious! Hair products, skin products, shaving products, medicinal products and the list goes on.
Not having this with me for 4 more days is a problem!!! Without this bevy of transformation aids, it can turn any man into looking like a Hobo in a matter of a couple of days. I (and my face) have become accustomed to using an electric razor. I embarked on this method of shaving for one simple reason. "I'm a bleeder"! Anytime I have tried to use any type of sharp object to remove the hair on my face, I look like I just ran into "Freddie Kruger" in a dark alley. I probably use a whole roll of toilet paper trying to stem the bleeding.
As for the rest of the things required, DW offered me the use of her things, (naturally she remembers where she put them) however, this presents a whole new set of problems. I use non-scented soaps so I don't smell like a lilac tree or a rose garden. As for anti-perspirant I again opt for a more manly scent rather than something floral. The shampoo part wasn't that bad, however, without Gel, my hair will look akin to Little Orphan Annie. A frizzed out, uncontrolled ball of curls.
So, this AM I embarked on the inevitable, making use of what I could, doing without what I could and buying what was available from the resort store (which was minimal).

But Hey! We're camping and roughing it.
Somewhere my situation fits in with this description.
Looking at the other patrons at the resort, it would appear that they too, forgot their shaving kits!


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