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Old 08-20-2017, 02:39 AM   #1
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The reasons why I had stop my travels.

I have briefly mentioned this on other posts when asked but i have become a stationary RV'r (yeah one of 'those' guys) but i thought i would lay out the whole chimichanga and many reasons why i felt it better and smarter to stop my travels now even though it breaks my heart to do so.

Initially watching videos of this way of life i thought it might be exciting, it would be a great way to me to get out of my shell and break down the walls that keep me in my little box. I thought it would enable me to own my own home finally since ill never ever be able to afford or qualify for a stick home in my life.

I thought i could do this way of life paycheck to paycheck. I thought that things would be different than sitting in an apartment wasting away. And finally i thought i could do this with my physical, emotional and mental limitations.

As it turns out some of it is true, but most of it is not, at least not in my case.

The first thing that hit me was the physicality of it. Bending, kneeling, climbing, lifting are all part of pulling a 5vr and there is no way to get around that. On a perfect day with its semi cool and i dont feel rushed its hard but its not horrible, i can take my time, go slow and eventually get it done.

However on the other days when its hot and sticky and im getting in a bad mood just walking out the door and trying to breathe in this heat it gets me agrivated quite quickly having to do all the physical stuff. Once i start sweating and i know i cant stop because i have to be somewhere, i get very very cranky and upset and i have very little patience for anything. This means that i tend to forget stuff or break stuff because im so miserable.

Dont forget that i am already in pain 24/7 from my back. Imagine if you had a horrible tootheache at work, could you focus, concentrate, get things done, probably not for most of us. I hurt even without all the challenges and it will be that way the rest of my life.

Next was the mental and emotional toll. Forgetting things upsets me greatly which wears me down for days. I used to be sharp as a tac and could micro manage so many things at one time. Now i have to litterally give myself directions and talk myself through almost everything including using the bathroom. The other day i was in the grocery store and i heard a voice say "mom who is that man talking to" i looked around and it turns out she was talking about me, i was having a outloud conversation with myself about what kind of freaken cereal to buy.

Which is the other part of this deal, i cant seem to just do something and do it, i have to justify it in my head. Even inside the RV i start to do something and im like "wait do this first" and "no dont do that do this" and "wait think dave what are you doing". Can you just imagine how i would be if i had to take an exit on the highway but i wasnt sure which one, i would be all over the road, very dangerious.

Then the financial part, im only one little disaster from ruin. If i was out west and my AC went out, fine just get some fans blowing and i could survive in the dry heat until i could get a new AC. But not here, not in swamp like country, i lose my AC and its over. I would lose so much water from sweating even with fans that i just could not survive.

Its totally sad that in order to live somewhere that is pretty and green you have to also deal with the toxic and hostile environment as well. Before i left New Mexico i made sure all the previous rust was gone on my truck, painted all the bolts in the cab, did the under coating, sealed and painted anything i could find that was bare metal. And even with all that this environment has attacked my truck with toxic results. I noticed today that my spare tire wheel is rusting, the valve stems are rusting, the brake calibers, and anything else that is left outdoors is totally attacked by the hostile elements here.

Also part of that hostility are the flys, bugs, spiders, ants, and wasps that constantly attack or make use of every little crevice imaginable on both the RV and truck. I cant even leave my windows cracked in my truck even bearly because if the spiders dont get in, then the fog and moisture do and this morning my stearing wheel and dash were soaked from just the moisture in the air.

Remember that part of this journey was to not only see the US but also to decide where i wanted to settle down eventually. So with that said, that pretty much rules out me ever settling in Louisiana, Florida, or any of the east coast because its much much worse in those places than it is here. So i really have no desire to fight the elements to a higher degree than i do here. Also i sent a message to my friend i was going to hang out with in Florida 1 month ago and no reply, so that ticked me off as well.

Then the truck part, i need a bigger truck, plain and simple. Those of you towing any kind of trailer, regardless of type, unless its under 12 foot long you need to get off the road and give up the half ton truck and go with a 3/4 ton truck minimum. I got lucky getting this far, i dont want to press the issue.

Then theres the whole conceal carry deal and with everything else going on and having to remember it all, i cant add on having to remember every single law from every single state, even if i read their law in the morning, i would forget by noon when i crossed the state line. And im not going to prison because i cant remember when and where i can carry per state. I know NM rules and now i know Texas rules mostly, thats all i want or need and all i can handle.

I have pretty much decided that i will just stay here and if i ever leave here and i still dont have a bigger truck at that time, i will just sell the trailer as is with the lot lease.

Then there is the box deal - if you never go out of your box then it really does not matter where your box is does it. There is nothing i can fathum that i must experience in another state that i cant live without. I have no art interest, no antique interest, no interest in tourists places, no interest in history or space flight, i really have very little interest in anything but sitting here thinking about why i have no interest in things lol

The good side of this is that i decided to stop before i or someone else got hurt or worse. And also because i happen to fall butt backwards into a great deal here which will allow me to save some money. I dont think that anything like this even exists in any part of New Mexico (1500 a year) i never heard of this till now.

The other good things are that i am not that far from home 700+ miles, it could be worse i could be on the other side of the US which would not be good. Also good is the fact that yes i tend to stay in my box alot and never go anywhere or do anything but at least on those days that i do feel like getting out and doing something, anything i would want to do is within 50 miles (dallas) and also all the the lakes of my choice which there are a ton of them.

Plus i have alittle yard i can take care of and i like the people here. The down side is that i dont stand a chance in heck of ever meeting anyone dating wise here even if i should change my mind and one day decide to date again. In order to do that i would need to be at a different kind of lake other than a bass fishing lake. The next nake over is all about water sports.

So with that i think its best that i stop, either regroup (which is not out of the question but doubtfull at this point) or just put the tires in concrete (not litterallly) and stay put. I told my boys that i would either drive my truck (no trailer) to see them in the spring (that i can prob handle) or just fly which i prob wont do because i dont trust its safety anymore.


Anyway sorry for the long tale, i just wanted to share my experience.

Thanks
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Old 08-20-2017, 08:09 AM   #2
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Dave, Thanks for the post. I understand a little of what you are going through. I am in constant pain from injuries that I started collecting in 1967. My wife and I are a few months from starting the full time lifestyle. I hope we have the good sense to stop as you did before I become a hazard to others. I hope you adjust to being stationary. We are in Dallas. Perhaps we can cross paths someday.
Best to you,
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Old 08-20-2017, 08:30 AM   #3
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Ya done good just trying it! Ya also done good recognizing the problems and adjusting as needed.

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Old 08-20-2017, 10:23 AM   #4
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Using your signature line 'You settled up!'.

Doing what you feel is right, is important, and a decision that way too many people don't make in time. And, as you alluded to - who knows, it may not be permanent!

Not sure where you are, missed it possibly, but one tip if you do have a need for another relocation. Look into the Escapees COOP's parks. Some are very reasonable to buy into. Some have park models, or actual houses. And all, have a community where those who want to get out and have interaction socially, can do so. Those that want to be left alone, can be left alone. And many parks have members that go out of their way to help other members if needed. (Rides to the store; rides to medical appointments; regularly checking in to assure safety; etc.)

Salute to you, and do keep in mind your own comment - that things can change in the future!
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Old 08-20-2017, 10:38 AM   #5
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Dave,

Thanks for sharing. I admire you for taking a leap and trying something new. If you had not you would probably still be in your apartment wondering "what if". I am only 58 years old so almost 7 years from retiring but have increasing health issues that make we wonder if my dream of spending signfiicant time on the road RVing in retirement will be practical. Like you did I am inclined to at least try it since it has been a dream of mine since a child growing up in Alaska to travel the USA in a nice RV.

I was amused reading what you wrote about talking to yourself in the grocery store. One of my recent "senior" habits is to unknowingly be humming out loud to whatever song is in my head while shopping. I don't realize it until I notice peoples heads suddenly looking up as they near me. LOL!!
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Old 08-20-2017, 11:10 AM   #6
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You are certainly a good writer and have presented your thoughts in a very well written organized manner. I can certainly understand the memory loss and disorganization of thinking patterns. It happens to me all the time. Instead of focusing on the immediate moment, you end up thinking of something else... and then you just forget what you started out to do. I can't tell how many times that has happened to me. It is very frustrating.

One thing that I started that I think helps... is keeping a daily log of what happened that day. I try to not go beyond 24 hours without making an entry. That sort of forces you to practice remembering. It also gives you a sense of presence. I have one of those yearly calendar books and I try to write something in it every day. Sometimes it is just stupid stuff... like routine chores, but it helps. Roughly once a month, I try to go back and read the earlier entries. By doing that, I feel like I did something useful

Also, since you have travelled to so many places, you may want to try to recall (and write down) something unique that you remember about each place.

Focus on positive stuff.

I think what you are experiencing happens to all of us or it will eventually happen. Certainly don't feel alone in this world.

Right away without knowing you, I can tell that you have great writing talent.
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Old 08-20-2017, 11:40 AM   #7
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Hang in there Dave, soon the weather will change to Fall temps and a lot less humidity and you will be much more comfortable. No matter where you live there will be challenges, some days they are worth the effort, some days not. But one thing for sure there will always be better days ahead, and you have to keep that faith. Like said maybe you can keep a log book of all the positive outcomes of your journeys and re-reading them will keep you focused on the positives. We all have those bad days or weeks, but persistence always pays off. I always enjoy reading your posts and your ability to express things that others can't/won't. Hang in there and God Bless.
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Old 08-20-2017, 11:48 AM   #8
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You do what you feel is right for you!
Me? Wife died a year ago so I'm getting the house ready to sell and take the 45' MH and go wherever I feel like.
I'm getting close to 71 and I have a few more decent years left. Not going to leave all the money to the kids either!
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Old 08-20-2017, 01:11 PM   #9
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Thanks everyone for your support and kindness, it is very much appreciated. For those of you just starting or about to start the adventure, wishing you the very best in your journey.

Mr_D so sorry for your loss, it is good to see you are going on an adventure rather than becomming secluded. Best wishes on your journey.
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Old 08-20-2017, 06:03 PM   #10
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MikeStafford View Post
We are in Dallas. Perhaps we can cross paths someday.
Well im not going anywhere for at least a year so if your up in the lake fork area some time let me know. I have only been to Dallas 1x in my life for a company event and we didnt get to see anything. I do remember the big building with the green light around it but thats all i remember. I will venture over that way prob closer to the end of the year when i have more expendable income so i can do stuff.
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Old 08-21-2017, 03:03 AM   #11
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Originally Posted by Durango Dave View Post
Well im not going anywhere for at least a year so if your up in the lake fork area some time let me know. I have only been to Dallas 1x in my life for a company event and we didnt get to see anything. I do remember the big building with the green light around it but thats all i remember. I will venture over that way prob closer to the end of the year when i have more expendable income so i can do stuff.
When you come this direction let me know and we will get together. Lake Fork is on my list of places to go in the spring when the bass fishing is the best. It is a shame to admit that as a bass fisherman I have never been on the best lake in Texas so I want to correct that.
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Old 08-21-2017, 05:48 PM   #12
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Not to worry mike your not the first one to put local stuff last, i did so in almost every place i lived. In vegas i went to the strip 3x and after that i never went back i just spent my time at the local neighborhood places. I do wish i would have known they had a gangster musiem there at the time i would have gone, but at the time i was spending my time trying to ruin my life and kill myself in the casinos and giving them all my money. I came very close to succeeding if not for a family intervention. Im sooooo glad that horrible habit is behind me (13 years now). I dont even play the lottery or scratch tickets now and i dont feel like im missing anything.
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Old 08-21-2017, 05:54 PM   #13
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I think you've found some freinds here....
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Old 08-21-2017, 07:58 PM   #14
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I think you've found some freinds here....
True and i hope so However one thing i have learned is that friends online is alot different than friends in person. There is a reason that they dont allow discussions on politics or religion on the forums... It allows people to remain friends online. I have met people before in person and we butted heads bigtime on several topics.
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