Alone and scared

[amber1962]

I Bought a bus conversion last week after a year of research. I'm a 49 year old single mom with a 17 year old on her way out of house soon. (My 22 year old lives near) I'm on temp disability from nursing (RN) in California. I have always wanted to travel and live in my own home on wheels. I loved the idea of working from one place to another. I still remember that program on TV with the Doctor who lived in the RV on the parking lot of the hospital. I have always wanted to do that. But, I'm a female and a nurse, not a male or a doctor, both of which are far more revered in our society.
I was abused and neglected as a child. Then I really have not mattered in our society at all as an adult. Trust me. When I read those posts ('most women RVer's are old enough to be my mother') it makes me cry. I don't feel that old, but now feel obsolete. Sometimes I think maybe I don't have the guts to face all the negatives involved in joining a club where I will face hearing or reading things that hurt me.
Well, I have no choice now. I spent my 401k on this bus conversion which I love. I am soon off to my new life that will lead me who knows where. I've never had any support or a helping hand. I have been on my own raising these two kids. Did not go out and socialize while raising them. I have no idea how to socialize. All I can do is start here and grow from that. I hope people are nice here. I hope people are not religious. I hope people are real here. I am not your average everyday Jane. I have often been judged for being different. I try not to judge others. I hope to meet lots of nice people that are like minded and maybe find a genuine friend or two, male or female. BTW-This is my first online post EVER! I've texted and emailed, but never posted on a board like this.
Thanks for reading.
Amber

[JOMARFL (FMCA 401058)]

Congratulations and go out there and have fun. Be safe, don't be in a hurry to get there and stay in touch with the family while on the road. A lot of great help on this board, ask away and someone will assist.

[W9WLS]

Amber: You will find "life on the road" a bit different from what you are used to.
Best advise I can render is "LEARN your new toy, it's systems, how they work and what they actually do (not just the book version) , take the time (and short trips) to get comfortable with it and learn how and why things work the way they do".
Don't be afraid to ask questions or post here, there are lot's of good people out here and a whole world of information and experience (s) to learn from.

[Good man]

Hello Amber,
Welcome to this family of people who share a common interest. Your post compells me to offer a few suggestions to you:

1. Learn all you can learn about your RV conversion. Determine the specific chassis upon which it is built and the motor/transmission which powers it. Make a detailed list of the major components such as generator, inverter and all appliances. That way, when you ask for assistance, the people who have experience with those types of chassis, motors/transmissions and supporting systems will be better able to help you. This site has specific sections for most of the popular engine/chassis configurations. You can also Google those components and get a world of information about problems, solutions, sources for parts, etc.

2. Find a good mechanic who can assist you with things you cannot do for yourself. Sometimes the tools for a particular repair are available on loan, sometimes not. Bear in mind that SAFETY issues trump all others when working on large machinery or with the many complex electrical systems on your rig. Learn to be self-sufficient within your native capabilities and you will certainly enjoy your new pursuit all the more.

3. Read all you can about the experiences of other single persons who enjoy this lifestlye. Adopt and adapt what you feel you can safely accommodate. Use your "street smarts" garnered from your RN career experiences... they are substantial and will be more than adequate to carry the day. Travel in safe areas, stay in controlled parks such as state/federal parks and don't advertise your vulnerabilities. Consider getting a dog... a "yapper" will alert you, but a big dog will actually have a chilling effect on anyone who intends harm. Check in with the Animal Control agency in your area... they have a lot of experience and can guide you to the perfect rescue hound to meet your needs if you decide to have a dog. Have a "check-in" person who is aware of your movements, travel plans and who can be on call to offer assistance. Obtain a good Roadside Assistance program specifically designed for large Recreational Vehicles. Eventually, you may befriend other single sojourners who would like to travel in tandem or convoy with you... that will substantially increase your safety and security.

4. Don't be overly concerned about making friends in the RV community. Just be a sincere person who is willing to ask for help if it is needed and offer help if it is appropriate. Respect everyone's right to enjoy this lifestyle in their own way... don't look down on anyone's rig or circumstances. Respect the space and property of others and be environmentally sensitive. Friends will come.

5. Most importantly... Just do it.
Best of luck to you!
Jim

[Glassalley52]

Welcome.

As a mother, I took a cross country trip years ago with two girls in a pop-up. First time ever doing anything other than tent camping and never before by ourselves. Had great experiences. In the entire time only had one scary incident and that was more of a misunderstanding, but another family saw what was happening and immediately stepped in and helped out. Bottom line - in the 3,000+ miles - one incident does not outweigh all of the GREAT fun we had.

Good Man has lots of good advice that I intend to implement as I may not always travel with my husband.

[85Eagle]

FMCA is for motor coach and motorhome owners. Motorcoach articles, motor home blogs, motor coach advice and motorhome videos.

Go to the above Link for Family Motor Coach Association and do a search for Chapters in your area and check for a Chapter for SINGLES as they have them all over the country. Also the links below are for Bus conversion board where you can get all kinds of advise about your Bus Conversion. I built my Silver Eagle Conversion from 1998 to present as these type of projects never end but they are worth it. Enjoy your Bus or Coach.

JCB

BNO - Bus Nut Online
Bus Conversions Magazine Bulletin Board - Index
http://http://www.eaglesinternational.net/

[Senior Chief]

Amber please keep in mind as you read these and other boards, that the written word does not always precisely convey what the speaker means. Without facial expressions to guide us, sometimes we interpret posts as curt or uncaring, when in fact they're just brief or to the point.

Take a deep breath when you read something that hurts you, and say to yourself "maybe that person doesn't realize how this sounds to me". Most folks in the RV community will give you the shirt off their backs, and would never dream of being hurtful.

You are a brave and daring woman to start this adventure. It can be more wonderful than you imagine, and your life can be filled with friends and joy.

Please PM me if you feel like a friendly chat.
Best wishes;
Allison

[Rick Long]

Amber, if you need a friend or a helping hand... just email or call.

Stop in at the Solo Forum... You'll meet others that have been in the same situation.

[bigskymt]

Once you are able to return to work you may consider one of the traveling nurses organizations. Keep you busy and CEUs current.
You'll find a lot help on this and other forms.
I second the FMCA Chapters, Roadside Assistance and dog recommendations.
Good luck on your new adventure.

[WOODYDEL]

No one has to justify their feelings. All feelings are legitimate and real for all people. My wife just the other day asked for me to keep the shotgun inside instead of locked up in the compartment in a locked case. Her feelings are legitimate and are unaffected even by my Marine Corps background.

Your first step has already been taken and you are to be commended for going against your very real fears.

[HoboPals]

Amber, you've come to the right place! People are wonderfully helpful and civil in this group. There are single women, like myself, who have stepped out there already.

I have friends who would never travel alone and thought I was nuts to take a six month trip last year. I would have stayed out longer (forever), but I had to return and my wings have been clipped for now.:(

The time or two, on my trip, when I was scared (usually when lost or on a steep hill) I said one of two things to myself. "What is the worst thing that can happen?" and "The worst thing that could happen in your life has already happened." It chased the panic and calmed me so that I could think clearly.

I'm terribly lonely, at home, without my husband--it doesn't change on the road except that my mind is occupied seeing and experiencing so many incredible places. People in campgrounds are very friendly, and I have found them always willing to help.

If you're like me, once you're on the road so many of the anxieties you're experiencing, now, will disappear. I enjoyed the company of other campers upon occasion, but I was also content to be with my pal, Jack. You might consider getting a little dog to travel with. There are cons as well as pros that you must consider within your own situation.

Good luck starting your new life. Keep in touch and let us know where you are!

[Ronnie Bledsoe 2006 Dutchstar 43']

All good advice above. You will find the RV community 99% friendly, helpful, and fun...the 1% need to get a life. In our travels across the country we have met many travelling nurses who seem to stay in 1 place for 3-4 months, make good salaries as no benefits, and take the remainder of the year off seeing the sights.
This is a friendly and helpful site, so don't hesitate to ASK!

[Bob N Deb]

RV parks are the friendliest places to be ,everyone is willing to help especially if you are a beginner. If you find you don't like the neibours you just get in and drive away. it is a great life enjoy yourself and have some fun.

[RickO]

... and congrats on your new rig and upcoming changes in your life. You really are to be commended.

You've already gotten wonderful advice but I'll emphasize one point made above in light of your inexperience with internet forums.

It really is true that written communications/exchange of ideas/debates, etc... are far more difficult than face to face exchanges where tone and expression and valuable tools to get one's point across. This can lead to misunderstandings and a feeling that someone is being rude or disrespectful in their posts. Although we do sometimes find rudeness, it is our job as moderators to keep that in check and we work hard to do just that. Don't let your feelings get hurt easily and feel free to ask any and all questions you might have. This really is one of the most friendly places on the web and you'll find our members are more than willing to help out.

Thanks for sharing your background with us and please stay in touch!

Good luck to you...

Rick