Anger Issues

[Bigd9]

It occasionally happens here in iRV2 forum and it happens in other forums. Someone will say something and "Pow" someone else will answer with a scathing retort. Why? Is it anger issues or something about what our society is becoming? I have pulled out of forums where this becomes what seems like the norm because I just hate to see this type of communication. Just wondering if anyone else feels this way, or am I becoming just to old and set in my ways?

[OSP1268]

I agree with you. I think it is a combination of the economy, people worried around loosing their income, home, lifestyle, health benefits (if they have any), and what is to come of their retirement. There is a lot of stress out there and it is effecting everyone in one way or another.

[CLIFFTALL]

All I can say is we take the "be nice rule " seriously here. If you or anyone else sees a post that violates this rule , we ask that you report it.
We handle a few of these each day.

Cliff

[Brockx]

Sometimes it is just a Walter Mitty vent, behind the safety of the keyboard. Whatever the cause, best to not address it directly, it just drags you down to their level and they are better at it than you.

[TXiceman]

People will get the Walter Mitty attitude when they can hide behind a keyboard. They think that they can say anything at all and feel powerful.

iRV2 is serious about the "be nice" rule and does enforce it. There have been "members" banned from the site for not following the rules and stirring up fights.

I have left a couple of Yahoo groups and RV.net for attacks that were not controlled properly. I all cases, I emailed the "management" and told them of the problem. The response I got back from RV.net was shocking to say the least.

A well managed forum will survive based on a nice normal membership. The ones that cannot follow the rules will leave or be banned.

Ken

[Dogpatch]

Doesn't matter where you go! Some people are just inherently Grumpy and don't want to agree, let someone have an opinion or let sleeping dogs lie.

We have good moderators for that here!

[flaggship1]

People have strong feelings about lots of things - AFC/NFC - AL/NL - religion - politics - the correct way to use/adjust air brakes - the homeless - union/nonunion. The list goes on. One thing I notice in common when these discussions go south is the use of "I" and the notion that my experience - my opinion - is the only correct one out there. This is inflating from specific to the general. My experience with this 1 guy in my little neck of the woods was bad so they're all bad. When something lights our fuse we should all try to put it out by some other means than pouring gas on it.

Truth be told - even when we agree with people here on a toxic topic - who really cares what the other guy thinks. Why try to build strength in numbers. 12 Angry Men can still be wrong.

And when we disagree - who really cares what we think. This is a wide open range here and range fires are never good. Ok I'm sure that's debatable - so one other thing - always and never are flammable too.

[Selah]

Pete.. Yes you are getting old and set in your ways..... as am I. However that has nothing to do with the message in your post. I agree whole hartedly. I believe that it is the sign of a person who is comfortable in his/her beliefs that they allow others to express theirs and can engage in a chivalrous dialog. I do not need to disparage another's opinion to fell OK about mine.

[cappelte]

Couldn't agree with you more, Pete.

[CD]

Originally Posted by Selah

Pete.. Yes you are getting old and set in your ways..... as am I. However that has nothing to do with the message in your post. I agree whole hartedly. I believe that it is the sign of a person who is comfortable in his/her beliefs that they allow others to express theirs and can engage in a chivalrous dialog. I do not need to disparage another's opinion to fell OK about mine.

You put it very well. It seems some people don't get that what they think is just their oppinion and not the only way. It's not new. It has been going on forever.

[wa8yxm]

Not anger, Frustration.

For example.. If you start a thread about a specific product line (or even other products in that same class) there is a poster who will quickly post a warning, He's done this many many times.. Now I will admit there is a grain of truth to his warning, but like sand on the sea chore, it's only a single grain on a very big beach.

A few folks have had problems with this product.. However in the largert picture, not many..

But he posts like "IF YOU HAVE THIS PRODUCT YOU WILL HAVE THIS PROBLEM".. Not true at all.

After reading his "stuff" a several dozen times.. We get frustrated.

[Ed-Sommers]

Originally Posted by Bigd9

It occasionally happens here in iRV2 forum and it happens in other forums. Someone will say something and "Pow" someone else will answer with a scathing retort. Why? Is it anger issues or something about what our society is becoming? I have pulled out of forums where this becomes what seems like the norm because I just hate to see this type of communication. Just wondering if anyone else feels this way, or am I becoming just to old and set in my ways?

Well, I see it another way. What you may call a "scathing retort", may just be a short and/or more direct answer, without the flowery, additional language to try to not be taken as offensive.

I often marvel at the turn around from the days when the speaker (writer) was given the courtesy of assuming that no offense was meant when something could be taken either pro or con, but now the majority of people take offense, when none was intended, which necessitates long drawn out answers to try to smooth things out.

I tend to give short, to the point answers that MAY, given the temperament of some people, offend, and I don't care! What I mean to convey is whats important to me, not how somebody takes it.

However, if it is indeed a true attack, and cannot be taken any other way by a thoughtful, intelligent, thinking individual, then I'd join in the damnation of the "scathing retort".


Ed
USN (Ret.)

[webslave]

Originally Posted by Ed-Sommers

I tend to give short, to the point answers that MAY, given the temperament of some people, offend, and I don't care! What I mean to convey is whats important to me, not how somebody takes it.

However, if it is indeed a true attack, and cannot be taken any other way by a thoughtful, intelligent, thinking individual, then I'd join in the damnation of the "scathing retort".


Ed
USN (Ret.)

While you may not intend to offend, and it is your god given right to speak any way that you want; a short to the point, bordering on curt, answer can be 100% correct, yet, the meaning be lost if that message cannot be conveyed in a manner that is acceptable to the intended recipient. In that case, the message, its meaning and intent is moot. I do not mean that you need to "bend over backward" to be polite, however, if your intent is to, indeed, be helpful, it behooves you to try and pass your information in a manner that is most receptive to the largest number of people, and people, by and large, react better and are more receptive to input if that input is more palatable.

The danger in any public forum where the speaker is not seen, the context not readily deduced and the result far from being personal is the lack of civility being demonstrated in these mediums (emails, forums, instant messaging and texting to name a few). People need to be reminded that the saying "The pen is mightier than sword" is based on a communicative truth; not just an old saying to keep philosophers employed. Wars have been started with "words" and the manner in which they are conveyed. The most abject truth matters not one whit if it falls on deafened ears.

I applaud this forum for its dedication to keeping things civil and, like another, I've found myself spending far less time at RV.net where there appears to be a growing group of folks that just seem to amuse themselves with worthless, inappropriate responses that aren't even on topic, just to "stir the pot" or boost their posting statistics. We need my mother around; she used to tell me "If you can't say something nice or convey a message that is constructive or informative in a way that the person understands it, then just keep your mouth shut, otherwise, your ignorance is all that is showing".

[papaw.1]

this is a great time to say10xxxxx right on. love this place. Happy trails