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Old 09-13-2017, 08:38 AM   #1
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Bored husband

We have been on many short trips over the last 18 months in our 2005 FLEETWOOD Expedition 37U. We love it. Husband just fully retired July 31 after over 40 years in law enforcement. If we stay somewhere longer than 3-4 days, he gets bored and depressed. I can't even get him out for a walk. If friends are also camping, he is fine but just the two of us he doesn't want to do anything. Not doing anything is ok, but he huffs, keeps asking what we need to be doing and he can't stand it that I like to read, do crafts and play on computer. He is 65 and in fairly good health. Any ideas?
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Old 09-13-2017, 08:56 AM   #2
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Give us some clues...
What does he like?
Activity during spare time while working?
Digital camera to collect memories of places you've been.
Get him involved in planning where to go next based on things to see and do there.
My advice to friends that are just retiring is to take a year to figure out what you like and develop a schedule or at least a routine.
Pick three things you would like to try or continue assuming you had some prior interests)...try them for 6-9 mos then continue activities you enjoyed...drop ones you didn't enjoy add new ones and try them.
Consider volunteering..
Some folks I know schedule stops around preareanged commitments to help habitat etc.
If interested you might consider a short work camp arrangement.
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Old 09-13-2017, 08:58 AM   #3
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I get restless too, especially if I'm in one place for too long.

Maybe he should seek something to enjoy.. maybe fishing, or maybe teaching private handgun lessons to beginners. I do both, and find both interesting.

Or select locations that have some value to him that he's always wanted to do, like the Grand Canyon, or the Seattle fish market or something like this. Where you can explore a new city. Where he finds some pre excitement to "arrive and do"

Best to you both! I hope he finds it, boredom can be crazy.
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Old 09-13-2017, 08:59 AM   #4
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Sounds like work was his main interest. It may take a while for him to adjust and he may need you to participate with him to get him started.

Maybe a hobby that he could take with him such as fishing, biking, carving or photography would get him interested.

For some people a dog to walk helps to get them moving.
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Old 09-13-2017, 09:06 AM   #5
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Trying to be delicate here, but maybe there is a way for him to put all those years of experience to use using a computer; asking if the locals (wherever you may be parked) could use his talents. Or is there a possible site already one can answer questions for ANY police department, much like this one? No? May be something to look into about setting something like that up. But instead of posting advise, you would have to use a phone to get questions answered. A consulting service, per se. At his convenience!
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Old 09-13-2017, 09:20 AM   #6
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Give him a badge and radar gun and send him out in the campground! That'll keep him busy!
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Old 09-13-2017, 09:29 AM   #7
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I did 39.5 years in L/E. I fill my time coming up with mods and inventions to make RVing more enjoyable.
Also I make it a point to visit any flea markets and garage sales in the area of our travels. Never know what treasures you will find.
Also spend some time answering the phone because I still remember where all the bodies are buried.
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Old 09-13-2017, 09:31 AM   #8
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Quote:
Originally Posted by gaf View Post
I did 39.5 years in L/E. I fill my time coming up with mods and inventions to make RVing more enjoyable.
Also I make it a point to visit any flea markets and garage sales in the area of our travels. Never know what treasures you will find.
Also spend some time answering the phone because I still remember where all the bodies are buried.

Hi ! Welcome to IRV2! We're sure glad you joined the gang!

Keep her between the ditches!

Good luck, happy trails, and God bless!
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Old 09-13-2017, 09:32 AM   #9
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Being together 24/7 is a big part of adjusting to retirement. Sounds like he's missing the interaction with colleagues. Not sure what your destinations are, but consider places that have opportunities for him to interact with others or maybe join an RV club and go to their rallies etc.
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Old 09-13-2017, 09:43 AM   #10
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Lots of good suggestions posted.

It does sound like he did not have a lot of interests outside of work. That will make it very difficult to get him motivated to something else. As the party that seems to have the most to gain you will have to find something for him to do.

Not fair for sure. He is an adult and should be able to take care of himself. I suspect there is a division of labor where you take care of the house, laundry, cooking, etc and he takes care of driving, fuel, repairs, etc.

He will have to find something to do that is challenging. Is there a local shooting club? Will he learn to golf (give him a set of lessons)?

There is a solution out there. Finding it may take some effort and creativity.
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Old 09-13-2017, 09:49 AM   #11
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How about amateur radio? Hams have an interesting way of finding each other and it's a portable hobby. They are also of great use during disasters and so your hubbys experience in public service would be a huge asset. And then there's cool gear to acquire, learn to use and fiddle with...

read here: What is Ham Radio
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Old 09-13-2017, 10:00 AM   #12
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Pretty sure you are married to my husband lol. We have not retired yet, and I have started warning him that he needs to find a hobby - and annoying me can't be it.

I love to read, knit and people watch. He gets antsy after a bit and starts with the 'what do you want to do now' routine. (last week I answered 'you could clean the toilets', which resulted in a few silent minutes)

No solution for you, but wanted you to know that you are not alone...
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Old 09-13-2017, 10:07 AM   #13
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I like to ride my Harley go shooting or get the camera out. Get hooked on this web site or just go site seeing, play cards there is lots to do.
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Old 09-13-2017, 10:23 AM   #14
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Campground hosting got us involved and gave us purpose and meaning. We saved a bunch of money and enjoyed the routine and being involved with park staff and interacting with campers. We still work seasonally as tax preparers too and that keeps our minds sharp
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