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Old 10-28-2011, 11:32 PM   #1
Senior Member
Dunner's Avatar
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: Phx, Arid~zona
Posts: 11,107
Dear God from a dog

Dear God: It's me, the Dog

Dear God: Is it on purpose that our names
are spelled the same, only in reverse?

Dear God: Why do humans smell the flowers,
but seldom, if ever, smell one another?

Dear God: When we get to Heaven, can we sit
on your couch? Or will it be the same old story?

Dear God: Why are there cars named after the jaguar,
the cougar, the mustang, the colt, the stingray,and the
rabbit, but not ONE named for a Dog?

How often do you see a cougar riding around?
We love a nice car ride! Would it be so hard to
rename the 'Chrysler Eagle' the 'Chrysler Beagle'?

Dear God: If a Dog barks his head off in the forest
and no human hears him, is he still a bad Dog?

Dear God: We Dogs can understand human
verbal instructions, hand signals, whistles,
horns, clickers, beepers, scent IDs,
electromagnetic energy fields, and Frisbee
flight paths. What do humans understand?

Dear God: More meatballs, less spaghetti, please.

Dear God: Are there mailmen in Heaven?
If there are, will I have to apologize?

Dear God: Here is a list of just some of the things
I must remember to be a good Dog:
1. I will not eat the cat's food before he eats
it or after he throws it up.
2. I will not roll on dead seagulls, fish,
crabs, etc., just because I like the way they smell.
3. The Litter Box is not a cookie jar.
4. The sofa is not a 'face towel'.
5. The garbage collector is not stealing our stuff.
6. I will not play tug-of-war with Dad's
underwear when he's on the toilet.
7. Sticking my nose into someone's
crotch is an unacceptable way of saying 'hello'.
8. I don't need to suddenly stand
straight up when I'm under the coffee table.
9. I must shake the rainwater out of my fur before
entering the house - not after.
10. I will not come in from outside,
and immediately drag my butt across the carpet.
11. I will not sit in the middle of the living
room, and lick my crotch.
12. The cat is not a 'squeaky toy',
so when I play with him and he makes that noise,
it's usually not a good thing.

P.S. Dear God: When I get to Heaven, may I have my testicles back?

2004 32' National Sea Breeze 1311 Class A on a F-53 Chassis, CHF, TST TPMS, 5Star Tune.
If Dunner (RVM23) can't fix it, it ain't broke!
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Old 10-29-2011, 12:37 PM   #2
fishngjb's Avatar
Newmar Owners Club
Coastal Campers
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Crystal Coast of NC
Posts: 38
Love this ! Heres to our "Best Friends" !!!

John & Betty-Minnie & Mickey, Toy Fox "Terrors"
2010 NEWMAR Canyon Star 36' TOYOTA Highlander & Golf Cart /w Tandem Tow Dolly
Good Sams Platinum Club,Ft.Fiends,Cancer Survivors,Retired
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Old 10-29-2011, 12:57 PM   #3
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Texas Boomers Club
Fleetwood Owners Club
Freightliner Owners Club
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Don't mess with Texas
Posts: 3,115
BTW...D-O-G = Deputy Of God
Jim with Judy
08 38' Bounder DP
Toads: 08 Jeep Wrangler Sport; 11 Chevy Malibu
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Old 10-29-2011, 03:12 PM   #4
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Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: Phx, Arid~zona
Posts: 11,107
Sadie(Min-Pin) is belly up on the MH couch. Must be nice...
2004 32' National Sea Breeze 1311 Class A on a F-53 Chassis, CHF, TST TPMS, 5Star Tune.
If Dunner (RVM23) can't fix it, it ain't broke!
Cheap Handling Fix Poll. Click Here to vote?
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