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Old 08-18-2011, 02:02 PM   #15
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Hey, I can LIVE on $2400 a month! Send it to me instead of pouring it into the "business"; you won't be any worse off, and I won't have to worry about losing my job .


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Old 08-18-2011, 02:36 PM   #16
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Wow, you guys r something. Thanks to everyone who had something to say (so far). holy cow 2 pages in 2 1/2 hours!
Too bad that tiny keyboard limited how much sense I could make?

It's my wife's business that loses $2400 a month, which is the payment on her studio that she has never made.
That building is currently for sale, not a single looker yet, and we are perhaps $50k upside down when/if it does sell.
She is ready/willing to pull her shingle down, disturbs her not to get paid for all her work too.

Our house is for sale too, for $200k less than it cost to build, and $200k more than it is worth these days.

My business is the one going down the tubes, and the one that just lost an 80k annual contract.

I am just sick of it. Sick of having to earn $30,000 a month "profit" just to break even.
Sick of walking past my "office manager" to see her cruising facebook and msn 5 hours a day...

Mostly just sick of being responsible for so many...
Wife... ok, not a problem there, 'cept she's really not into fulltiming in the rv.
22 yo son, just got out of prison (a week ago, see other thread)
19 yo son, plays video games... a lot. took 4 jr college classes last year, got zero credits. been looking for a job unsuccessfully for 4 years.
13 yo son. cute as a button, just starting to get that teen aged mounth on him!
52 yo brother in law, worked for me for 20 years...
his wife, never had to work.
his daugther and her bf, came home from california recently, she quit a job, he quit college, both moved to BIL's house.
Office manager Deb, went to HS with wife, family friend longer than forever.
Her husband, one legged unemployed electrician, out of work over 2 years, on the verge of losing thier house...

Damn it sounds good to just drive that fancy bus into the sunset.

Shortly after I made the original post, I called the wife, suggested we go camping this weekend. She's all for it. Sounds good, I could use to get out for a bit.

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Old 08-18-2011, 04:42 PM   #17
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Jim, Camping is the answer only you and her! Lay out your feelings in a non accusatory way. She should know how you feel but may not and vice versa. Tell the inlaws it's time to go, family and business is hard but a bad employee has to go no matter who their related to.

Camp, talk, relax, little fun and leave the TV off!
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Old 08-18-2011, 06:45 PM   #18
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Jim, just have the DW read this thread. You won't have to say a word! I sure hope you can get your problems solved. It's not good for anybody to be under that much stress. Good luck & God bless!
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Old 08-18-2011, 07:44 PM   #19
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Every now and then you have to take a real serious look at your situation and make some real hard decisions. I don't know about everyone else but I've had to make some unpopular decisions in the past to get myself & spouse out of debt. May not make you popular but sounds to me it you continue you as you have been you are adding to the long range problem. Bottom line is you have to do what is best for you and your family even if "they" don't approve. Just my personal opinion.
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Old 08-18-2011, 08:47 PM   #20
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Decided to go camping this weekend. That always helps my stress level.

Really tired of being tied to the "Sticks and bricks."
The longest we've ever been away is a month, a good portion of that spent screaming down the highway to get to a destination.

We'll see. Our house and her studio have been listed for sale for a month or so. But the real estate market around here is pretty sad, and our debt level pretty heavy.
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Old 08-18-2011, 09:13 PM   #21
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Get as much cash as you can, payoff Moho and jeep if they are not. BK, dump house and studio, sell business and tell your wife you are finically done, and you would like her to come Fulltime with you. if she says no, ask her for a better plan. if she says yes, take off. You could always home school the kid.

I know sounds easier said then done.

Just an idea, probably not a good one, but one.

Good luck and enjoy your trip.
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Old 08-18-2011, 09:18 PM   #22
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if your business is causing this level of stress and you can't sell wife's shop, maybe filing bankruptcy could be something that you could look at and the two of you and your son, living in rv for awhile and just get some relief from the worry of hanging on to something unprofitable and stressful. letting go of possessions /material things could give you a whole new lease on life and perhaps after a few months the two of you could either workcamp or come up with jobs that do not cause undue stress while you take a few years to just enjoy life without so much responsibility. just don't give up on things getting better, just hang in there and find someone you can talk to.
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Old 08-18-2011, 09:35 PM   #23
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The thought of starting life over again can be defeating. The thought of starting anew and finding happiness may be an enlightening journey.

Hope all goes well this weekend. Perhaps a heart to heart with DW will help?
The best to you and the path you chose.
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Old 08-18-2011, 09:43 PM   #24
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Ii just posted the stuff below on another thread:
Well, maybe, maybe not.
I retired in 1998 with a pension and went back to work. We had planned to go full time when we both reached 65 (I'll be 65 in Jan and my wife in Dec 2012). Then my parents got sick and died within a month of each other. So we "inherited" all their worldly goods and the calls from creditors. No money left after their sickness and giving most of it away to my son.
Then, my step daughter died three years ago so we "inherited" her worldly goods, calls from her creditors, 3 cats AND two grandsons (9 and 16). She was on public assistance so the "worldly goods" weren't much. And no savings there either.
One grandson is out of high school but got grants to go to college and plans to keep living at home (without paying any room and board nor even his cell phone bill). The youngest is just going into the 6th grade.
Kind of ties us down!!
Our income when we fully retire will be over most couples working wage without touching any of the savings or IRA's
So, as you can see, money isn't keeping us from full timing! We are considering doing schooling for the youngest as we travel though. Schooling as we travel to various natural wonders and sites would be a real boon. I know it was when I was young!
And frankly I'm about to say "chuck it" myself! Kick the older grandson out, sell the antiques and Hummel collection, the artwork, the house, one car and GO!!!
We closed our part time business down three years ago. The inventory is in the living room and the shelving etc is in the garage. Step daughters stuff is on the back deck, my parents stuff is in the living room and family room. All of it needs to go but I can't get my wife to help at all, she's too depressed over her daughters death.
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Old 08-19-2011, 05:08 AM   #25
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Jim, you need to have an office meeting and explain to your employees the business is not making it and you may have to close the doors and let them know they may not have a job much longer. Your first responsibility is to your family (and your sanity), obviously the wife's business is toast and must be closed thus saving $2400 a month. I too am in business for myself and know the worries you face on a daily basis, there are no easy answers and it's hard to see a light at the end of the tunnel. You have to close down the wife's business now, get rid of your employees and take a hard look at your business. I wish you and your family the best.
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Old 08-19-2011, 08:06 AM   #26
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Times are tough like others said.......however what are the priorities?
First to the minor...you made them, to the wife you took an oath so unless she has violated the oath you still have to honor it. Contarcts, you made contracts with others such as banks, employees etc. Sounds like the employees violated their contract but also sounds like you set the climate over the past 20 years and failed to give them leadership on expectations. Yes today there are all sorts of ethical relative means to absolve you of your responisbilities it depends on you. Time to decide.
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Old 08-19-2011, 08:54 AM   #27
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This is a good thread. And I suspect many are in a similar situation, sick and tired of being sick and tired of their surroundings, work, and overall working life. When we get sick and tired of somethng we tend to take action, prior to that we often are too comfortable. I would certainly let the employees that are not worker bees know that it is almost over and that you are looking at closing or retiring the business. If they want it, that it fine; if not they are on alert that they will need to move on soon. Relationship issues can be tough but in the end you need to do something as the same old stuff is not cutting it anymore. Sometimes change is good for us albeit a little scary. Get a fresh start with the wife and let the employees fend for themselves perhaps for the first time ever. Everybody understands that you will some day retire, why not now, and effectively deal with several issue all at the same time. After you think about it for a few months or even a few years, you might restart a business, watch who you hire or rehire and move on. Life should be good not something we hate.
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Old 08-19-2011, 12:59 PM   #28
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I have a brother inlaw who closed his sporting good store, now living off of his wife for three years what a dead beat. I also have a uncle who closed their gmc,Pontiac car dealership made them sick, the good news they owned the building now renting it, they seem to enjoy the less stress now it's gone. The economy has a long ways to go.

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