For my Navy Buds

[Bob/Becky D - VA]

Ensign Montgomery was holding morning muster (roll call) and hes calling
out the names...

"Jackson?"
"Here!"

"KIBBEY?"
"Yo."


"STEPHENS?"
"Present, sir."

"Robbins?"
"Yo."

"SEEBACK?"
(Nothing)

"SEEBACK?!"
(Still nothing)

"DAMMIT, SEEBACK!"

The Chief quietly tells the Ensign, "Turn the paper over, sir."

[Seajay]

LOL .... Somehow I can just see that......
I heard this told for the truth but I can not vouch for it.
A guy joined the Navy and his two front names were initials only so when he signed up here is what they put on his papers...

B(only) N(only) JONES

During his entire tour in the Navy he was known as
(are your ready for this?)

BONLY NONLY JONES Sn. first class.....

If it is a lie, it aint mine ......

Bring our troops home now please.......

[Route 66]

We had a guy in our guard unit with no middle name.

On official documents, his name was listed as Bob N.M.I. Jones. (no middle initial)

[Wayne M]

We had a Marine name "Smith." His first name (truly) was General.

What ever General Smith wanted, General Smith got with just a phone call. He would not preference his name with his rank, just say, "This is General Smith, I need a helicopter for a courier run." No problem. Helicopter dispatched.

[Bob/Becky D - VA]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Wayne M We had a Marine name "Smith." His first name (truly) was General. What ever General Smith wanted, General Smith got with just a phone call. He would not preference his name with his rank, just say, "This is General Smith, I need a helicopter for a courier run." No problem. Helicopter dispatched.

Remember him well Wayne, and you're right, he was our go to guy when we needed something.

Bob

[Route 66]

We also had sergeant named Major Travers and another sergeant named Chester Fields.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Wayne M We had a Marine name "Smith." His first name (truly) was General. What ever General Smith wanted, General Smith got with just a phone call. He would not preference his name with his rank, just say, "This is General Smith, I need a helicopter for a courier run." No problem. Helicopter dispatched.

[Seajay]

This is the truth as I remember it from my days aboard the Norton...
There was a destroyer named ''Charles P. Cecil'' DD835 in the second fleet while I was stationed aboard the Norton. Back then when the captain of another ship arrived aboard the Norton the Bosn would ''whistle aboard'' that captain announcing over the PA system the name of the ship he was in command of. ...........''Captain .?????????? ..Arriving''. They would also do this when a captain of another ship departed. I think it was to show respect.... Anyhow ...
We had just pulled into Pier 7 for fresh veggies and eggs. I was walking down to Main Communications, one of the largest comm. rooms on the ship. As I turned to go thru the hatch way the PA system crackled and the Bosn Whistled and announced ... ''CAPTAIN, CECIL ARRIVING''........
As I stepped into the Comm Center everyone there including the Chief of the Watch immediately jumped to their feet, came to attention and gave a proper Navy hand salute in my direction.............. They held the salute until I returned same and shouted ....... ''AS YOU WERE,,,,,,,,, CARRY ON MEN''.....
The roar of laughter could be heard three decks down I'm sure and I believe everyone threw paper wads at me, laughing like idiots.......''Gerwald Rm3 politely asked me if ''THE CAPTAIN'' would like a cup of coffee, SIR?'' .... more paper wads flew........
After you have been at sea for two or three weeks doing 8 on and 8 off for 21 days it don't take much to entertain you.
Some of the old salts would catch a new guy and tell them that I was a famous sailor with a Destroyer named in my honor because I was some kind of hero for saving a Admirals life or some junk like that. More than a few came up to me and saluted and told me how proud they were to be serving on the Norton with me. After a while I finally went along with the gag. I was kinda like the ''golden rivet'', the ''bucket of steam'', the ''mail bouy watch'', and the ''mermaids'' and ''sea bats'', ''sky hooks'', the ''paper stretcher'' and all the other gags you pull on ''boots'' when they come to sea duty for the first time.....

So it went on the Norton with nothing much to do....

God bless all service personnel regardless of uniform color or rating insignia in our fine military services. Keep them all safe under Your mighty hand and bring them back to their loved ones safe and sound ....... Keep them safe in the bounding ocean, the limitless sky, and the dangerous lands they trod.
Nuff said I guess.....

ps for those of you that may not know this my given name is Charles R. Cecil.

[Nuge]

Ever get sent to the rope locker for 6" of gig line?? LOL!!

Then there's the joke about the Marine and Sailor in the head:

A Marine walks into the head as a sailor is finishing relieving himself. The Sailor starts to walk out as the Marine is unzipping and asks the Sailor "Hey Swabby, don't they teach you to wash your hands when you're done in here?" The Sailor replies "No they don't, Jarhead, they teach us NOT to pee on our hands!" LOL!!! Semper Fi and Fair Weather and Following Seas to all those who served in the Big Blue..

[allegroman]

Seajay, one in the same ballpark, ok?

When the capt of my ship came and went, he was announced as "Putnam arriving" etc.
As et2, I had given an assignment to a sn to go to the ship tied up alongside for a parts run, but when I got to the et shack, there he was, playing cards. I blew up at the poor guy until he explained he couldn't do it because we had already left port.
Ya, he said. He heard it on the 1mc that "Putnam departed".
only on the 'pissy pete', dd757
am

[W4RLR]

In my Air Force days, we were not above sending the newbies to base supply for a 500 foot reel of flight line or a 55 gallon drum of prop wash.

Classic.

[Usnret05]

How bout a bucket of steam.... Or mail buoy watch..... Or prop wash ( navy) .... or send the new guy down to the engine room for a BT punch... Lol good ole navy days underway ..... Underway shift colors ... Gator Navy here ... You call we haul.....
BM1Marc BWitt
USN Ret 76-05

[Usnret05]

Hi fellow swabbies just a note we never whistled we "pipe" someone aboard or ashore" and it's a Bosun pipe... Not a whistle ... Lol

[Seajay]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Usnret05 How bout a bucket of steam.... Or mail buoy watch..... Or prop wash ( navy) .... or send the new guy down to the engine room for a BT punch... Lol good ole navy days underway ..... Underway shift colors ... Gator Navy here ... You call we haul..... BM1Marc BWitt USN Ret 76-05

May I be the second to welcome you to irv2 forums. I see you are Navy retired and it is good to have a fellow ''Anchor Clanker'' on board.
may God bless you for your service to this great nation .....
Seajay the sailor man .......
Wind to your back my brother .... Smooth seas ahead .....

[mick]

Nelson (reading aloud): " America expects every person to do his duty, regardless of race, gender, sexual orientation, religious persuasion or disability". "What gobbledygook is this?"
Hardy: "Admiralty policy, I'm afraid, sir. We're an equal opportunities employer now. We had the devil's own job getting 'America' past the censors, lest it be considered racist."
Nelson: "Gadzooks, Hardy. Hand me my pipe and tobacco."
Hardy: "Sorry sir. All naval vessels have been designated smoke-free working environments."
Nelson: "In that case, break open the liquor ration. Let us splice the main brace to steel the men before battle."
Hardy: "The liquor ration has been abolished, Admiral. Its part of the Government's policy on binge drinking."
Nelson: "Good heavens, Hardy. I suppose we'd better get on with it ....full speed ahead."
Hardy: "I think you'll find that there's a 4 knot speed limit in this stretch of water."
Nelson: "Damn it man! We are on the eve of the greatest sea battle in history. We must advance with all dispatch. Report from the crow's nest please."
Hardy: "That won't be possible, sir."
Nelson: "What?"
Hardy: "Health and safety have closed the crow's nest, sir. No harness. And they said that rope ladder doesn't meet regulations. They won't let anyone up there until a proper scaffolding can be erected."
Nelson: "Then get me the ship's maintenance crew without delay, Hardy."
Hardy: "He's busy knocking up a wheelchair access to the fo'c'sle, Admiral."
Nelson: "Wheelchair access? I've never heard anything so absurd."
Hardy: "Health and safety again, sir. We have to provide a barrier- free environment for the differently abled."
Nelson: "Differently abled? I've only one arm and one eye and I refuse even to hear mention of the word. I didn't rise to the rank of admiral by playing the disability card."
Hardy: "Actually, sir, you did. The U.S. Navy is under- represented in the areas of visual impairment and limb deficiency."
Nelson: "Whatever next? Give me full speed. The salt spray beckons."
Hardy: "A couple of problems there too, sir. Health and safety , they don't want anyone breathing in too much salt - haven't you seen the adverts?"
Nelson: "I've never heard such infamy. Break out the big guns and tell the men to stand by to engage the enemy."
Hardy: "The men are a bit worried about shooting at anyone, Admiral."
Nelson: "What? This is mutiny."
Hardy: "It's not that, sir. It's just that they're afraid of being charged with murder if they actually kill anyone. There's a couple of legal-aid lawyers on board, watching everyone like hawks."
Nelson: "Then how are we to sink the enemies?
Hardy: "Actually, sir, we're not."
Nelson: "We're not?"
Hardy: "No, sir. The enemies are our partners now. According to the Common Fisheries Policy, we shouldn't even be in this stretch of water. We could get hit with a claim for compensation."


Hardy: Now put on your Kevlar vest; it's the rules. It could save your life"
Nelson: "Don't tell me - health and safety. Whatever happened to liquor, sodomy and the lash?"
Hardy: As I explained, sir,liquor is off the menu! And there's a ban on corporal punishment."
Nelson: "What about sodomy?"
Hardy: "I believe that is now legal, sir."
Nelson: "In that case ...kiss me, Hardy".