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Old 10-25-2011, 02:12 PM   #1
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New plan to save the economy

To save the economy, on October 30, 2011, Congress will announce that they are ordering the immigration department to start deporting old people (instead of illegals) in order to lower Social Security and Medicare costs.

Old people are easier to catch, and will not remember how to get back home!

.....see you on the bus.

P.S SAVE ME A WINDOW SEAT



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Old 10-25-2011, 02:22 PM   #2
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An old prospector shuffled into town leading a tired old mule.

The old man headed straight for the only saloon to clear his parched throat.

He walked up and tied his old mule to the hitch rail. As he stood there, brushing some of the dust from his face and clothes, a young gunslinger stepped out of the saloon with a gun in one hand and a bottle of whiskey in the other.

The young gunslinger looked at the old man and laughed, saying, "Hey old man, have you ever danced?"

The old man looked up at the gunslinger and said, "No, I never did dance... Never really wanted to."

A crowd had gathered as the gunslinger grinned and said, "Well, you old fool, you're gonna dance now," and started shooting at the old man's feet.

The old prospector --not wanting to get a toe blown off-- started hopping around like a flea on a hot skillet. Everybody was laughing, fit to be tied.

When his last bullet had been fired, the young gunslinger, still laughing, holstered his gun and turned around to go back into the saloon.

The old man turned to his pack mule, pulled out a double-barreled shotgun, and cocked both hammers.

The loud clicks carried clearly through the desert air.

The crowd stopped laughing immediately.

The young gunslinger heard the sounds too, and he turned around very slowly. The silence was almost deafening.

The crowd watched as the young gunman stared at the old timer and the large gaping holes of those twin barrels.

The barrels of the shotgun never wavered in the old man's hands, as he quietly said, "Son, have you ever licked a mule's butt?"

The gunslinger swallowed hard and said, "No sir..... But... I've always wanted to."

There are a few lessons for us all here:

1 - Never be arrogant.
2 - Don't waste ammunition.
3 - Whiskey makes you think you're smarter than you are.
4 - Always, always make sure you know who has the power.
5 - Don't mess with old men; they didn't get old by being stupid..

I just love a story with a happy ending, don't you?



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Old 10-25-2011, 02:58 PM   #3
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Just one lesson came from that - Save the last bullet for the old man..


Cya's
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Old 10-25-2011, 03:04 PM   #4
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I'm not old enough to get on the buss, will someone please tell the folks at AARP to leave me alone.

Wayne
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Old 10-25-2011, 03:19 PM   #5
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Quote:
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I think we should hijack her threads

Amateurs...

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Old 10-25-2011, 03:24 PM   #6
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I knew you couldn't resist

You still love us.
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Old 10-25-2011, 03:27 PM   #7
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Dunner View Post
An old prospector shuffled into town leading a tired old mule.

The old man headed straight for the only saloon to clear his parched throat.

He walked up and tied his old mule to the hitch rail. As he stood there, brushing some of the dust from his face and clothes, a young gunslinger stepped out of the saloon with a gun in one hand and a bottle of whiskey in the other.

The young gunslinger looked at the old man and laughed, saying, "Hey old man, have you ever danced?"

The old man looked up at the gunslinger and said, "No, I never did dance... Never really wanted to."

A crowd had gathered as the gunslinger grinned and said, "Well, you old fool, you're gonna dance now," and started shooting at the old man's feet.

The old prospector --not wanting to get a toe blown off-- started hopping around like a flea on a hot skillet. Everybody was laughing, fit to be tied.

When his last bullet had been fired, the young gunslinger, still laughing, holstered his gun and turned around to go back into the saloon.

The old man turned to his pack mule, pulled out a double-barreled shotgun, and cocked both hammers.

The loud clicks carried clearly through the desert air.

The crowd stopped laughing immediately.

The young gunslinger heard the sounds too, and he turned around very slowly. The silence was almost deafening.

The crowd watched as the young gunman stared at the old timer and the large gaping holes of those twin barrels.

The barrels of the shotgun never wavered in the old man's hands, as he quietly said, "Son, have you ever licked a mule's butt?"

The gunslinger swallowed hard and said, "No sir..... But... I've always wanted to."

There are a few lessons for us all here:

1 - Never be arrogant.
2 - Don't waste ammunition.
3 - Whiskey makes you think you're smarter than you are.
4 - Always, always make sure you know who has the power.
5 - Don't mess with old men; they didn't get old by being stupid..

I just love a story with a happy ending, don't you?
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Old 10-25-2011, 03:29 PM   #8
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Tallyrver View Post
I'm not old enough to get on the buss, will someone please tell the folks at AARP to leave me alone.

Wayne
Wanna buy a vowel... I mean hat?



Any relation to Bob Tally?



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Old 10-25-2011, 03:39 PM   #9
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Old 10-25-2011, 03:47 PM   #10
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(Left to right):

Curley...Moe...Larry...

Hey!

Same order as the first three posters in this thread!

Francesca
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Old 10-25-2011, 04:29 PM   #11
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Just Think! if all us old folks were shipped out of the country this is what will happen.
1- there will be no money in any banks
2- no credit card companies would ever get paid
3- all the grocery stores would go out of business
4- all the doctors would go broke
5- drug stores would fold
6- and our kids would not know who to call when they need money
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Old 10-25-2011, 05:11 PM   #12
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LMAO
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Old 10-25-2011, 06:00 PM   #13
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I'll drive!
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Old 10-25-2011, 08:41 PM   #14
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Francesca View Post
Yeah...That's it!
All the stooges in a nice little row...
I've tried to be all three stooges all at once, but I failed.



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