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Old 01-06-2011, 06:56 AM   #1
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Nuff said I guess....





Back in late January of 04 we had a terrible fire in a building I own down in High Point, NC. Since I still owned the building and had sold the business in same I went down to help Richard with repairs to the building and to get it back up and running ASAP. I took the motor home down and parked beside the factory and used it for a ''home base'' while I helped with the building repairs. The fire was about a quarter million blaze so we had a lot to do. One fourth of the building had to be completely re built and we hired a contractor to do this. Lots of other ''stuff'' had to be fixed and we put in some long days that stretched over into the nite on many occasions. It goes without saying that I am not as ''tough'' as I once was and sometimes I would simply fall into bed and ''die'' at the end of a days work.


After a couple weeks of eighteen hour days, seven days a week we decided to ''take a weekend'' off. It just so happened that I had met Willa and things were proceeding nicely between us except for this slight interruption. I called her up in Boone and asked if she would like to ''come down to High Point'' for a comfortable weekend at Howard Johnson's. She said yes and I awaited her arrival. The great error I made was to give Richard, the new business owner, my key to the motor home in case he might need some information from the computer inside the coach. Big error.....


Willa came down and we had a lovely time together all snug and warm with much attention to my tired old body with warm baby oil rub downs and much pampering from her. Willa is a nurse with a bedside manner to die for. .......... Anyhow, the weekend end went very nicely and was over way too soon.. Willa bid me farewell on Sunday evening after supper and she departed for Boone and I went back to the motor home parked beside the factory.


It was dark when I pulled up to the coach and it was starting to drizzle one of those cold rains that freeze you to death slowly. I got out of the Tracker and reached for the ''key'' to the side door. Hummm? Where is my key? Richard has it and he is in Greensboro, twenty miles away. I said SHUX. I looked at the small sliding window beside the door and noticed that it was not ''latched''. I pulled the Tracker up close to the coach and used it for a ladder and climbed up to where I could slide the window open and then the screen open. The rain was getting serious and it felt like there was ice in it now.


It should be under stood that I am not a small person. I am six feet one and about two twenty five at that time and the window is about twelve by maybe fourteen and it is right in front of the recliner in the coach and the recliner was turned so that the ''back'' of the recliner was against the window on the inside. I said SHUX again.


With great effort I hoisted my now wet, cold body up to the window and stuck my head thru and my right arm and shoulder. I learned from inspecting boilers that any place you can stick your head and one shoulder thru, you can crawl thru thought it may not be real easy. With great effort and much cursing I managed to kick, squealer, and wiggle my way on to the top of the back of the recliner with my legs and feet still outside of the coach. In the process of success I managed to rip all the buttons off my shirt and to lose one sneaker in the process I reached the point where my ''top'' was heavier than my ''bottom'' and I tumbled down the back of the recliner and finished up with my head on the floor and the rest of my body ''following along'' in a great heap of soggy, button less, one sneaker less ,cold mass but I was inside the coach. After a minute I composed myself and managed to stand and turn on some lights and to go turn the furnace wide open while I looked for dry clothes. All was going well with the heat coming up nicely and dry clothes on my body, I flopped in the recliner with a nice shot of something twelve years old over ice and re lived my wonderful weekend with a beautiful lady with a warm bottle of baby oil and a ''bed side manner'' to die for. (nuff said about that)


I decided that it would be a good idea to get in some solid sack time because tomorrow as going to be another long day so I checked all the windows, locked the Tracker doors and locked the side door to the camper. Just out of curiosity I checked the ''drivers side door'' that I almost never use to be sure it was securely closed and locked and ........GUESS WHAT............... Yep, the drivers door was unlocked. All I would have had to do was walk around the coach and come in thru the drivers door.


Lesson learned. Always keep a spare door key hidden somewhere on the outside of the coach and keep a bottle of scotch inside the coach for when you get wet and lose a sneaker in a cold rain storm in late January while climbing thru a small window over a recliner and landing on your head on the floor with your shirt buttons all ripped off and your sneaker outside in the rain full of wonderful memories of a fabulous weekend well spent with a beautiful nurse with a warm bottle of baby oil and a bedside manner to die for.


Nuff said I guess.......



Lets all thank a vet for their service to this country. Without their sacrifice , we would be speaking German or Japanese probably.......
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Old 01-06-2011, 11:29 AM   #2
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No, no PLEASE
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Old 01-06-2011, 05:41 PM   #3
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We learned the necessity of a spare key the hard way with our last coach; after the fact I put one in the furnace enclosure wire tied to a wiring harness, there have to be 80 places to put one in an rv-now that you mention it I wonder just how many with a coach have a 'hidden' key ?
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Old 01-06-2011, 07:01 PM   #4
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I believe all of that story except the part about Willa.
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Old 01-06-2011, 07:22 PM   #5
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Ha! Ha! I was thinking the same thing Dadeaux stated. Willa is to smart to be with someone that du..... never mind.

Edited: Hmmm! Six foot 1 inch, 225 pounds (then). Seajay, maybe I spoke a little hastily.
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Old 01-06-2011, 10:56 PM   #6
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I believe all of that story except the part about Willa.
All true my friend. Yep, all true even about Willa. Yep, she was a Nurse and she thought and still thinks I am the greatest. (i still aint sure what she saw or sees in me but such is life and we still have a lot of fun with ''warm baby oil'') We were a little younger then and ''things'' were still kinda in the ''discovery'' mode back then. Our lives are still very exciting and we take every day (and nite) with a scenes of excitement and discovery and she still has a ''bedside manner with the patient paramount in her concerns''.........


Word to the wise. If you have a ''choice''..... 'choose a nurse'......

Nuff said for now....
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Old 01-06-2011, 11:32 PM   #7
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Ok so I'll go along life must be good for you. BTW I'm married to an EMT with a pretty good bedside manner could you tell me where you get that oil.
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Old 01-07-2011, 08:24 AM   #8
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Ok so I'll go along life must be good for you. BTW I'm married to an EMT with a pretty good bedside manner could you tell me where you get that oil.
Any kind of ''baby oil'' will do or you can use mineral oil just as well.
Heat it in the sink under hot water. NOT IN THE MICRO WAVE. it can melt the bottle or explode..... BOOM... very distracting and messy also....
Test it on ''the inside of your arm'' for the proper temp. Very warm but not ''HOT"...
Light a couple of scented candles.
Put a large beach towel on the bed........
If you are old like me put some Johnny Mathis on the cd player. This guy has a voice like velvet......
Go slow and love your lady. Make her know that she is the greatest thing God ever made and you would stop a bullet to save her life.
Enjoy the ambiance of ''touch'' and the wonderful smoothness of her skin under your finger tips. GO SLOW. REAL SLOW.
If you do a good job she will return the favor times ten and more.

Nuff said before I get censored ........
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Old 01-07-2011, 09:34 AM   #9
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....Nuff said Seajay. There are women who read this forum. (I'm glad my DW is not one of them..... Baby Oil! HHmmmfff!
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Old 01-07-2011, 04:29 PM   #10
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....Nuff said Seajay. There are women who read this forum. (I'm glad my DW is not one of them..... Baby Oil! HHmmmfff!
Wayne my Marine friend, you might be pleasantly surprised what some simple TLC might accomplish for you my friend. If you come home from ''golfing'' some evening to 'lit scented candles', 'soft music playin', a 'quart of warm baby oil on the nite stand, and a beautiful Earlene smiling at you , you had better be SAILOR READY my Marine friend or we could be reading about you in the Obituaries ........ lol........
(all in fun my Marine Brother, I would hate to lose you....lol....)

Lets all ask someone important to bring our troops home real soon....
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Old 01-07-2011, 04:34 PM   #11
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Well, when DW was having problems and the doctor told her to walk more, I asked if she could do it carrying golf clubs. Works for me.

(I'm glad she doesn't read this forum, but I bet I have "friends" on here that will tell her what I say.)
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Old 01-07-2011, 04:55 PM   #12
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Got your dress blues ready there Marine? You should look nice laid out in them. Been nice knowing you................lol...............
(Ping...... had to do it my bro)
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Old 01-09-2011, 07:20 AM   #13
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For the few of you that would like to get all the things that Seajay talked about go to any drug stores ADULT SECTION, no not the DEPENDS area, but the other one. There you can buy everything in one package, K-Y sells a complete package of soft music, body oils-K-Y jelly.
The nice part is the CD is nice anytime to listen to.
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Old 01-09-2011, 08:57 AM   #14
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And Seajay probably gets 10 cents for every one sold. He probably has a couple dollars in royalties by now.
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