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Old 03-26-2012, 07:47 PM   #1
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One More For Wayne, Semper Fi

I searched the site but couldn't find this so here goes......


AN ACTUAL CRAIG'S LIST PERSONALS AD




To the Guy Who Tried to Mug Me in Downtown Savannah night before last.
Date: 2010-09-27, 1:43 am. E.S.T.
I was the guy wearing the black Burberry jacket that you demanded that I hand over, shortly after you pulled the knife on me and my girlfriend, threatening our lives. You also asked for my girlfriend's purse and earrings. I can only hope that you somehow come across this rather important message.
First, I'd like to apologize for your embarrassment; I didn't expect you to actually crap in your pants when I drew my pistol after you took my jacket.. The evening was not that cold, and I was wearing the jacket for a reason.. my girlfriend was happy that I just returned safely from my 2nd tour as a Combat Marine in Afghanistan .. She had just bought me that Kimber Custom Model 1911 .45 ACP pistol for my birthday, and we had picked up a shoulder holster for it that very evening. Obviously you agree that it is a very intimidating weapon when pointed at your head ... isn't it?!
I know it probably wasn't fun walking back to wherever you'd come from with crap in your pants. I'm sure it was even worse walking bare-footed since I made you leave your shoes, cell phone, and wallet with me. [That prevented you from calling or running to your buddies to come help mug us again].
After I called your mother or "Momma" as you had her listed in your cell, I explained the entire episode of what you'd done. Then I went and filled up my gas tank as well as those of four other people in the gas station, -- on your credit card. The guy with the big motor home took 153 gallons and was extremely grateful!
I gave your shoes to a homeless guy outside Vinnie Van Go Go's, along with all the cash in your wallet. [That made his day!]
I then threw your wallet into the big pink "pimp mobile" that was parked at the curb ..... after I broke the windshield and side window and keyed the entire driver's side of the car.
Earlier, I managed to get in two threatening phone calls to the DA's office and one to the FBI, while mentioning President Obama as my possible target.
The FBI guy seemed really intense and we had a nice long chat (I guess while he traced your number etc.).
;In a way, perhaps I should apologize for not killing you ... but I feel this type of retribution is a far more appropriate punishment for your threatened crime. I wish you well as you try to sort through some of these rather immediate pressing issues, and can only hope that you have the opportunity to reflect upon, and perhaps reconsider, the career path you've chosen to pursue in life.. Remember, next time you might not be so lucky. Have a good day!
Thoughtfully yours, Semper Fi,


Alex
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Old 03-26-2012, 07:57 PM   #2
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Crime and punishment that works!! Good one!
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Old 03-26-2012, 08:01 PM   #3
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Old 03-26-2012, 10:12 PM   #4
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Kind of warms your heart
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Old 03-27-2012, 08:45 AM   #5
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Though funny the incident did not really happen
snopes.com: Letter to Mugger
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Old 03-27-2012, 08:51 AM   #6
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It did in my mind. (Hee hee!)
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Old 03-27-2012, 09:08 AM   #7
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Iron Man View Post
Though funny the incident did not really happen
snopes.com: Letter to Mugger
It's absolutely beyond me why someone must let the truth (IF, indeed, Snopes is accurate - last time I checked, they aren't divinely inspired and, thus, infallable) get in the way of a good story.

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Old 03-27-2012, 09:14 AM   #8
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Has Snopes changed their work force? It used to be just the Mickelsons, wife and husband, that did all ther research and posting. I wonder where the find all the time.

Must be two 12 hour shifts.
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Old 03-27-2012, 05:20 PM   #9
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Wayne M View Post
It did in my mind. (Hee hee!)
I read this
Quote:
This piece began its life as a 6 January 2009 post to Craigslist, a forum for local classified ads and discussions in more than 550 cities.
It was quickly removed by that entity, lasting no more than a day or two
on that site, but nevertheless was picked up and sent around in e-mail
by those it resonated with.
So being snopes admitted it was on Craigslist then it is what I claimed it to be so is true and the rest is definitely not relevant.
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