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Old 12-28-2014, 03:46 AM   #57
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Nuclear,


I am curious what you decided.


Five years ago my Mom came down with cancer. We had taken care of his Mom who died of cancer 3 years before. Our son became disabled (he is now back to work after 8 yrs). Sister died @ 57, nephew died @46, and my niece came in and took care of Mom while I worked and the rest of the day and months of her care were on me.


Husband lost his job 11 yrs ago when it went overseas (we got hit before everyone else) but we had most stuff paid off so were ok.


I can tell you I will never regret taking care of our Moms. I was with my Mother when she took her last breath as well as his. Hard, Hard, but necessary. Not enough sleep during most of that time, feeling like my heart was shattering because I had to watch them both die inch by inch, but many good memories too.


During all this I started having heart arrhythmia. Never enough sleep or time to distress. Worked in a cardiac unit and the stress level there was through the roof. The arrhythmia was inconvenient but my heart had had enough and I wasn't listening to it. Three automobile accidents followed with a fused neck and nerve damage. (none of them were my fault) Felt like I had a target on my car.


Monday Dec 22nd I had a heart ablation because of that arrhythmia. It is normally done on the Atrium but mine was Ventricular I am 62 in February. The plan is to work for 3 more years due to insurance. I could walk away now otherwise. But being off this last week I wonder if it is worth it. How much more does my heart take before it just gives up.


I have some big decisions to make and so do you. I had promised my Dad I would never put my Mom in a nursing home. I kept that promise but at what cost? Work and responsibilities are slowly killing people. Our lives are full of stress. Many here say people don't say "I wish I had worked longer".


There is never an easy answer. I hope you find the answer that works for you. Lynne
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Old 12-28-2014, 07:27 PM   #58
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Everyone has to do what works for them, everyone sure has different requirements, responsibilities, needs & wants.
My thoughts are to never sell the home place, no matter what you do, it is nice to be able to go home, I can not see my self calling a motor home "Home". Being 73, both DW & I, no debt, still run our business, the DW thinks we will be running it for another 30 years .
Despite having had a stroke 20 yrs ago, other wise we are in fairly good health.
The sad part, our better than average SS payments only take care of about 35% of our tax load, so it is sort of a rat race, no complaints.
We spend about 6 weeks a year enjoying our travels, favorite place it the Custer State Park in SD.
Just do what makes you happy, you will not take it $$$$$$ with you.
Dave M
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Old 12-29-2014, 01:00 AM   #59
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Beamisl, IMHO if you can afford to retire than go. Maybe you can take on part time work if you need to. If you must stay then find a way to reduce that stress.
Ps Taking care of your folks in their last days is the most honorable thing a person can do in my opinion. Hang in there!!!
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