Go Back   iRV2 Forums > iRV2.com COMMUNITY FORUMS > Just Conversation
Click Here to Login
Join iRV2 Today

Mission Statement: Supporting thoughtful exchange of knowledge, values and experience among RV enthusiasts.
Reply
  This discussion is proudly sponsored by:
Please support our sponsors and let them know you heard about their products on iRV2
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread Display Modes
 
Old 01-12-2015, 08:30 AM   #43
Senior Member
 
BigBlockTank's Avatar
 
Ford Super Duty Owner
Join Date: Oct 2014
Posts: 173
I was disciplined as a child. I got my butt tore up with a belt, and deserved it every time I got it.

I went in the USAF at 19, I was married and had a child by the time I was 20, and a second by 23. They got their butt tore up when it was deserved. No abuse, no whipping on the back, the legs, calves or anywhere else, just the backside.

Being in the military, I set rules and guidelines for both of our boys, and they damn well followed them. I am from the school 100% is acceptable, not 99%.

Whatever you do, how ever you do it, just do it. Be a parent, and teach your kids. Don't be a friend, until they are out of your house, and then you still have to be a parent sometimes. It doesn't happen in my family, but if they call and ask for money, they get the third degree. I'm not going to enable my children to have, and keep bad habits. If you don't have money for rent this month, what happened? You had it last month, what did you do different?

One last thing......please do a good job teaching your children, when you're done with them, the rest of us have to put up with them if you didn't.
__________________

__________________
Tank Thomas, USAF Ret.
There are no secrets to success. It's the result of preparation, hard work and learning from mistakes.


BigBlockTank is offline   Reply With Quote
Join the #1 RV Forum Today - It's Totally Free!

iRV2.com RV Community - Are you about to start a new improvement on your RV or need some help with some maintenance? Do you need advice on what products to buy? Or maybe you can give others some advice? No matter where you fit in you'll find that iRV2 is a great community to join. Best of all it's totally FREE!

You are currently viewing our boards as a guest so you have limited access to our community. Please take the time to register and you will gain a lot of great new features including; the ability to participate in discussions, network with other RV owners, see fewer ads, upload photographs, create an RV blog, send private messages and so much, much more!

Old 01-12-2015, 09:07 AM   #44
Senior Member
 
Ford Super Duty Owner
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Lowell, Arkansas
Posts: 4,679
Several posters have mentioned, "Setting rules/limits." That's one that is most important. The importance of that was driven home by one of my students.

He was not a bad kid just had little direction. His Dad owned a heavy equipment salvage yard, (Cat's etc) and an airplane. Money was not an issue. One day we were heading out on a 2-3 day school trip. Mom showed up in her Caddy and asked me if $200 was enough for her boy. Several weeks later the kid got a 5 day suspension and was assigned to ISS (In school suspension).
The guy who ran the program had also worked in a prison. The first day new kids didn't set down at their desk but stood at their cubical all day. They wrote all the rules ten times. They also had to do all teacher assignments twice, once for him and once for the teacher.

When the kid came back to classes I asked him how he liked ISS?? His response was, "I loved it." That's when I realized that kids really do want and need limits/guidelines. Doing that tells them that somebody does care. They also want to know what is going to happen if they cross the line. Yes they will always push the limits. They really do want to know that you care. It's also VERY important to carry through with the consequences when they do cross the line. When people in authority don't follow through they loose their position as the one in charge. That's when things begin to fall apart.

When you get right down to it, "It's really not rocket science." It's a simple application of COMMON SENSE.

1. Set the rules/expectations.
2. Explain the consequences when #1 is broken.
3. Follow through with #2.

Setting rules 1,2 & 3 have to be tempered with a good dose of COMMON SENSE. If you fail to consistently follow or waver in any one of the above steps you WILL most definitely fail as an authority figure, parent, boss or leader.

Military training does work. My AF time was the best time in my life. I am a better person because of it. And I really learned just what I can do and not what I couldn't do. Can't do is not part of my life.

TeJay
__________________

__________________
TeJay Auto Instructor/4-yrs USAF/ Liz: RN/ WBGO 2014 Vista 30T/ F-53/CHF/5-Star/Koni * Bella & Izzy * Golden /Cocker mix/ Louie The Cat* All Retired
TeJay is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-13-2015, 11:12 AM   #45
Senior Member
 
Ray,IN's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2001
Location: North America somewhere
Posts: 13,686
Quote:
Originally Posted by biosensai View Post
I taught high school Biology for over 3 decades. Over that time I had a brazillion parent conferences. It wasn't so much how the parents disciplined their kids, but that they did. Far, far too many just didn't. I cannot tell you how often I had to explain to parents that their job was to be the parent. Not to be the friend. Kids need boundaries and are inherently comforted when they know what they are and what to expect. Physically abusing a child is obviously illegal and wrong. Immediately identifying inappropriate or unacceptable behavior in conjunction with a disciplinary action that actively discourages a repeat of the action - remember a child's brain doesn't necessarily identity cause and effect the way an adult mind should - is the job of a parent. I obviously never spanked my students, but I had many parents ask why their kids did what I said and not what they, the parent said. Set the boundaries. Enforce them.

Well stated! I was spanked as a child, and whipped with a razor strap a few times as a teenager. I deserved all of them, and several I didn't get. I think what I am today is the result of what I learned then.
I remember my Mom reminding me repeatedly to remove my cap when entering our house. Observe the number of men wearing baseball caps in restaurants,theaters,etc. today. Mom was ma'am, Dad was sir. Every other adult is today, age immaterial.
How long has it been since a man was seen removing his hat while a funeral procession passed.(rhetorical question) Shoot, today some young men will not even remove their hat for the National Anthem.


And, I agree with TeJay. IMO the worst disservice we the people of the U.S.A. ever did to our children was to eliminate the military draft. Military training teaches most inductees to be adults when parents have not.
__________________
2000 Winnebago Ultimate Freedom USQ40JD, ISC 8.3 Cummins 350, Spartan MM Chassis. USA 1SG, retired;PPA,Good Sam Life member,FMCA."We the people are the rightful masters of both the Congress and the Courts - not to overthrow the Constitution but to overthrow men who pervert the Constitution. "Abraham Lincoln"
Ray,IN is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-15-2015, 05:21 PM   #46
Member
 
Workhorse Chassis Owner
Join Date: Jan 2015
Posts: 52
I am 65 and walked the same road you have. I as you found out what a belt fells lick across my butt. Even so, I managed to live a good, fruitful life. gale
__________________
galeran is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-15-2015, 05:39 PM   #47
Senior Member
 
Barbaraok's Avatar
 
Alpine Owners Club
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Traveling in North America
Posts: 1,444
Sorry, but if you are resorting to hitting a child then you have lost control. Hitting only teaches fear. There are other ways to discipline, but for very small children it isn't discipline but removal from the danger that is needed.

Try all the words you want, but hitting is hitting and it is never correct to hit a child.
__________________
Barbara & David O'Keeffe
Figment II (Alpine 2002 36 MDDS)
On The Road since 2006
Blog
Barbaraok is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-15-2015, 05:59 PM   #48
Senior Member
 
StevieG's Avatar
 
Fleetwood Owners Club
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Milton, NY
Posts: 915
Sorry to disagree with so many posters, but IMO, it's no more appropriate to hit your child than it is to hit or wrongfully touch your spouse or significant other. I raised two boys and never ever resorted to raising my hand or even a spank on the bump. There are ways to punish and reward your children that are very effective deterrents and incentives. When you hit them, all you are teaching them is that use of physical force is okay. Okay at school, okay with their siblings, okay with their kids when they get older, and okay with their significant other. Abuse breeds abuse.
__________________
Steve & Beth - Milton, New York
2006 Monaco Knight 38 PDQ
Ready Brute Elite-2016 Ram 1500 Quad Cab 4x4
StevieG is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-15-2015, 10:35 PM   #49
Senior Member
 
Ray,IN's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2001
Location: North America somewhere
Posts: 13,686
That's what Dr. Spock said. His son turned out troubled and committed suicide.
__________________
2000 Winnebago Ultimate Freedom USQ40JD, ISC 8.3 Cummins 350, Spartan MM Chassis. USA 1SG, retired;PPA,Good Sam Life member,FMCA."We the people are the rightful masters of both the Congress and the Courts - not to overthrow the Constitution but to overthrow men who pervert the Constitution. "Abraham Lincoln"
Ray,IN is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-15-2015, 10:57 PM   #50
Senior Member
 
flaggship1's Avatar


 
Fleetwood Owners Club
iRV2 No Limits Club
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Rainbow Riding
Posts: 18,385
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ray,IN View Post
That's what Dr. Spock said. His son turned out troubled and committed suicide.
Snopes says nope.
Grandson yes. Son no.
It is sad when someone chooses to end their life. As an argument in favor of whipping children I'm not sure it would hold water in any event.
__________________
Steve & Annie (RVM2)
2008 Fleetwood Bounder 38F ~ 325 ISB Turbo ~ Freightliner XC 2014 CR-V ~ Invisibrake / Sterling All Terrain
Sioux Falls, SD (FullTime Since Nov 5th 2014)
flaggship1 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-16-2015, 09:00 AM   #51
Senior Member
 
oakcreekeric's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: Oak Creek, WI
Posts: 937
Spanking (not hitting, not abuse)... or not spanking...

I think the common denominator with everyone who has replied to this thread is; they were involved in their kids lives...

I think that is what is most important.. too many parents today are expecting coaches, teachers or (god forbid) the TV to educate and raise their children for them... not sure why.. they chose to have the children, they should understand the responsibility... sadly in today's society... that is no longer the case... I fear children (for some) is just a passing fancy in their life, they are too selfish to understand the responsibilities that are involved..
__________________
Eric & Denise
2012 Itasca Sunstar 35F
2010 Harley-Davidson Ultra Limited
oakcreekeric is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-16-2015, 09:18 AM   #52
Senior Member
 
flaggship1's Avatar


 
Fleetwood Owners Club
iRV2 No Limits Club
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Rainbow Riding
Posts: 18,385
We did not use corporal punishment with our daughter. We will not know the outcome of that because she died in a car wreck at 16. I am so glad I have no memory of raising my hand to her. I do have memories of my parents raising theirs to me, as they had of their parents to them. I know they did because they both told me how much better I had it with their wailing than they did. What nonsense. See below and tell me the difference. And, I will not believe the difference is love of your child.
Attached Images
 
__________________
Steve & Annie (RVM2)
2008 Fleetwood Bounder 38F ~ 325 ISB Turbo ~ Freightliner XC 2014 CR-V ~ Invisibrake / Sterling All Terrain
Sioux Falls, SD (FullTime Since Nov 5th 2014)
flaggship1 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-26-2015, 01:40 PM   #53
MPH
Senior Member
 
MPH's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2014
Location: Somewhere on the Rainbow. Fulltiming and lovin' it!
Posts: 2,033
Quote:
Originally Posted by flaggship1 View Post
We did not use corporal punishment with our daughter. We will not know the outcome of that because she died in a car wreck at 16. I am so glad I have no memory of raising my hand to her. I do have memories of my parents raising theirs to me, as they had of their parents to them. I know they did because they both told me how much better I had it with their wailing than they did. What nonsense. See below and tell me the difference. And, I will not believe the difference is love of your child.
Steve, I guess I didn't know that y'all lost a child. I can't begin to imagine the pain you and Annie must endure.

I don't understand how hitting a child is ever a "good" thing. I knew a parent who whipped her son because he got into a fight at school. That kind of "logic" is mind-blowing.

Mel
__________________
Mel & Kate and Zorro, our dashing, one year old little Havanese dog.
2004 Tiffin Allegro Bus 40 QDP, "Joy", our Rainbow Rider
"Be yourself. Everyone else is already taken."
MPH is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-26-2015, 02:17 PM   #54
Senior Member
 
flaggship1's Avatar


 
Fleetwood Owners Club
iRV2 No Limits Club
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Rainbow Riding
Posts: 18,385
Quote:
Originally Posted by MPH View Post
Steve, I guess I didn't know that y'all lost a child. I can't begin to imagine the pain you and Annie must endure.

I don't understand how hitting a child is ever a "good" thing. I knew a parent who whipped her son because he got into a fight at school. That kind of "logic" is mind-blowing.

Mel
Thanks Mel. In fact I have lost 2 children 16 years apart. My son was a senior in high school and was hit by a car 2 weeks after my daughter was born. 16 years later my then 32 year old daughter accidently ran a light. She was physically unharmed. We lost our daughter that day in 2003. She loved to camp and hike and fish.
__________________
Steve & Annie (RVM2)
2008 Fleetwood Bounder 38F ~ 325 ISB Turbo ~ Freightliner XC 2014 CR-V ~ Invisibrake / Sterling All Terrain
Sioux Falls, SD (FullTime Since Nov 5th 2014)
flaggship1 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-26-2015, 02:26 PM   #55
RVM #74
 
PushedAround's Avatar


 
Tiffin Owners Club
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Ambler, PA
Posts: 2,853
Blog Entries: 7
Steve, you literally have me tearing up thinking about your children. You and Annie are especially strong people to have endured such pain and still be so positive. I cannot wait to meet you in April.
__________________
Larry & Cheryl Oscar, Louie, Ranger & Henry (our Springers)
PushedAround is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-26-2015, 02:35 PM   #56
Senior Member
 
flaggship1's Avatar


 
Fleetwood Owners Club
iRV2 No Limits Club
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Rainbow Riding
Posts: 18,385
Quote:
Originally Posted by PushedAround View Post
Steve, you literally have me tearing up thinking about your children. You and Annie are especially strong people to have endured such pain and still be so positive. I cannot wait to meet you in April.
We'll be there... one in a kimono and one decidedly not in a grass skirt. You can thank me later.

To whom much is given, much is asked.

Mer as young'n in the B-van...
And riding English.
Attached Thumbnails
Click image for larger version

Name:	1422304413837.jpg
Views:	58
Size:	68.6 KB
ID:	84326  
Attached Images
 
__________________

__________________
Steve & Annie (RVM2)
2008 Fleetwood Bounder 38F ~ 325 ISB Turbo ~ Freightliner XC 2014 CR-V ~ Invisibrake / Sterling All Terrain
Sioux Falls, SD (FullTime Since Nov 5th 2014)
flaggship1 is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply



Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
2013-2014 Excursion owners' post mikebrls Fleetwood Products Owner's Forum 547 02-27-2017 10:29 AM
New Owner - Now have more questions - :-) rcarriere Entegra Owner's Forum 59 10-25-2014 07:56 PM
Tough Duty Cat320 Military / Veteran RVing 16 03-18-2014 10:24 PM
Concerns on Tag axle 2003 Monaco exec 43 ft lbaldwin Monaco Owner's Forum 5 08-26-2013 03:03 PM
Air Leveling and Air Tank Pressure Mike Canter Monaco Owner's Forum 17 08-06-2013 03:53 PM

» Virginia Campgrounds

Reviews provided by


Copyright 2002- Social Knowledge, LLC All Rights Reserved.

All times are GMT -6. The time now is 03:19 PM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.8 Beta 1
Copyright ©2000 - 2017, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.