Journey with Confidence RV GPS App RV Trip Planner RV LIFE Campground Reviews RV Maintenance Take a Speed Test Free 7 Day Trial ×
RV Trip Planning Discussions

Go Back   iRV2 Forums > MOTORHOME FORUMS > Class C Motorhome Discussions
Click Here to Login
Join iRV2 Today

Mission Statement: Supporting thoughtful exchange of knowledge, values and experience among RV enthusiasts.
Reply
  This discussion is proudly sponsored by:
Please support our sponsors and let them know you heard about their products on iRV2
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread Display Modes
 
Old 10-22-2014, 05:50 AM   #15
Senior Member
 
RanCarr's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2011
Posts: 1,910
Quote:
Originally Posted by Firebug5 View Post
After falling into the same situation as you folks, with me being the one living like your hubby, my wife gave me a big hug one day, and asked me how she could get the "Old Bruce" back? I thought about it, then heard a movie quote from Shawshank Redemption, "Get busy living, or get busy dying". Wow, that hit me hard. I chose to get busy living, and now she tells me "You chose WISELY"!
Indeed you did choose wisely. I tell him we'll be dead a long time so we need to live NOW. To enjoy ourselves while we can before we're too old or illness befalls one of us. It falls on deaf ears. He claims he's not depressed and doesn't seem to be, but lacks interest or enthusiasm for anything that takes a little effort. He's changed so much in the last few years I sometimes wonder if he's the same man I married or a "Pod" person from outer space.

Quote:
Life is too damn short, my wife was almost killed by a drunk driver, then almost died from Lyme disease that was misdiagnosed and caused a stroke along with cardiac dysrhythmias, THEN was T-boned at a highway intersection by a construction truck! All of these occurred within a 3-year period. She wants to live SO BAD, really enjoys life, and it has almost been taken away so many times. Well, that is our story, and it worked for us.

Good luck and God bless!

Bruce
That's just awful. I hope you've both totally recovered by now. Again, life is short and you did choose wisely. We only get one go-around so have to make the best of it.
__________________
Retired. RVing with one husband and five cats.
1999 32' Fleetwood Southwind Class-A. Ford V10.
RanCarr is offline   Reply With Quote
Join the #1 RV Forum Today - It's Totally Free!

iRV2.com RV Community - Are you about to start a new improvement on your RV or need some help with some maintenance? Do you need advice on what products to buy? Or maybe you can give others some advice? No matter where you fit in you'll find that iRV2 is a great community to join. Best of all it's totally FREE!

You are currently viewing our boards as a guest so you have limited access to our community. Please take the time to register and you will gain a lot of great new features including; the ability to participate in discussions, network with other RV owners, see fewer ads, upload photographs, create an RV blog, send private messages and so much, much more!

Old 10-22-2014, 06:01 AM   #16
Senior Member
 
RanCarr's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2011
Posts: 1,910
Quote:
Originally Posted by DallasOregon View Post
That would be tough. Hubby and I do hang out in the MH in the evenings, but during the day, we hike or just check out the area. We like to go, go, go!
In the evenings I don't mind so much as after dinner and a walk I'm usually ready to sit by a fire and just enjoy some company. Sometimes just sit and read or get online. During the day he'll go to WalMart every few days for supplies but has little to no interest in checking anything out anywhere we go. We took that trip out west in May and he couldn't rush me fast enough to head back home to TN. He was constantly pushing me to hurry hurry hurry - he had very little interest in the wonders of the west. We missed so many things I wanted to see in Yellowstone and the area around the Grand Canyon. I wanted to revisit some of the places I saw in the 1970s with my ex-husband and things I missed on "that" trip. We didn't even stop at the other NPs. I'm bitterly disappointment as I looked forward to the trip for 2 years. Spent all that money and all that time on the Dutchman. It was supposed to last 4 to 6 weeks. We were back here in 20 days. As you can tell I'm having some trouble dealing with this.....
__________________
Retired. RVing with one husband and five cats.
1999 32' Fleetwood Southwind Class-A. Ford V10.
RanCarr is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-22-2014, 06:12 AM   #17
Senior Member
 
RanCarr's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2011
Posts: 1,910
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mr_D View Post
Sounds like my wife! We get somewhere, I do most of the setup, then all she wants to do is sit inside and watch TV. Her health is poor, if she stays outside very much she gets ear aches and maybe a cold.
Then it's understandable. When someone doesn't feel well it can be hard to be enthused about things. She can always wear one of those hats that cover her ears and wrap in a blanket if it's chilly outside. But if she's watching TV that can't be much fun for you.

Quote:
I was raised going RV'ing and enjoy it, her, not so much. The I end up doing all most all the teardown and have always done all the driving although right now her medical conditions keep her from driving anything.
I'm sorry your wife is not well. She may not be able to do more than she's doing now. One thing is we do share the set-up and tear-down equally. We both load and unload after a camp-out or trip. I usually get finished inside before he's done outside, so I go out and help him while my coffee perks. This Class-C is so much easier to set up and tear-down than the TT. No comparison. I can't even lift the WDH or get the anti-sway bars on the TT's hitch.

I am the one stuck doing all the cleaning however. The TT takes 2 afternoons to thouroughly clean after use. The CC only 3 to 4 hours.
__________________
Retired. RVing with one husband and five cats.
1999 32' Fleetwood Southwind Class-A. Ford V10.
RanCarr is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-22-2014, 08:15 AM   #18
Senior Member
 
Monaco Owners Club
Join Date: Sep 2014
Posts: 4,569
Camping (even in an RV) is not for everyone. As much as I look forward to at least part timing I can't imagine choosing that over my wife's wishes.
If your hubby is just as disconnected at home than all you can do is make the best of it.
Many women are solo'ing now. Maybe if your husband knew that you accept him for just going with you. He would be there to help setup and to make you feel safe. He doesn't want to do the other stuff. You can still invite people to the campfire. You can still do the day trips. You can still fish and watch the stars and ......
The bitterness is coming out in your post and if you can't manage a change in mindset than you will soon be truely "solo'ing.
I hope you're able to come up with something that works for the both of you.
Good luck.
okcnewbie is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-22-2014, 08:23 AM   #19
Senior Member
 
Thor Owners Club
Join Date: Jun 2011
Posts: 2,893
It sounds like your DH is disconnecting from life in general, some might call it depression. His lack of enthusiasm for RVing is the most obvious example to you that something is wrong. Might think about having a talk with his doctor. Hopefully you both can sort this out together.
Fred1609 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-23-2014, 02:43 AM   #20
Senior Member
 
RanCarr's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2011
Posts: 1,910
Quote:
Originally Posted by okcnewbie View Post
Camping (even in an RV) is not for everyone. As much as I look forward to at least part timing I can't imagine choosing that over my wife's wishes.
If your hubby is just as disconnected at home than all you can do is make the best of it.
It looks that way.

Quote:
Many women are solo'ing now. Maybe if your husband knew that you accept him for just going with you. He would be there to help setup and to make you feel safe.
As already posted, we BOTH set-up and tear-down. No use repeating what was already posted.

Quote:
He doesn't want to do the other stuff. You can still invite people to the campfire.
It doesn't work that way anymore. At least not in the local COE CGs here. Couples tend to stay to themselves and with the family members they go camping with.

Quote:
You can still do the day trips. You can still fish and watch the stars and ......
He has no interest in fishing, swimming, hiking, photography, outdoor cooking or looking at the stars.

Quote:
The bitterness is coming out in your post and if you can't manage a change in mindset than you will soon be truely "solo'ing.
I hope you're able to come up with something that works for the both of you.
Good luck.
Thanks. Bitterness and disappointment are hard to hide forever. I'm finding that out. I'm not bitter at him as he is what he is. People change over time. I'm just getting frustrated because I can't change anything living here.
__________________
Retired. RVing with one husband and five cats.
1999 32' Fleetwood Southwind Class-A. Ford V10.
RanCarr is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-23-2014, 03:02 AM   #21
Senior Member
 
RanCarr's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2011
Posts: 1,910
Quote:
Originally Posted by Fred1609 View Post
It sounds like your DH is disconnecting from life in general, some might call it depression.
I'm not sure this is depression. It's really hard to describe. He's always been one to tire of things quickly, but this is a little different. I think he would be happy to sell both RVs and be left to his TV and PC, go out to eat once in awhile and not have to deal with anything anymore. He reminds me of someone in their 90s if you can understand what I'm saying. His health is good otherwise and the medication takes care of the fibromyalgia pain. I'm starting to feel I'm just here because I'm here. I feel he's disconnecting from me also. God help us both is this is something more sinister.

Quote:
His lack of enthusiasm for RVing is the most obvious example to you that something is wrong. Might think about having a talk with his doctor. Hopefully you both can sort this out together.
I already did that and the Dr changed his pain medications. It allowed him to focus better on his driving - but otherwise didn't help.
__________________
Retired. RVing with one husband and five cats.
1999 32' Fleetwood Southwind Class-A. Ford V10.
RanCarr is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-23-2014, 06:01 AM   #22
Senior Member
 
Monaco Owners Club
Join Date: Sep 2014
Posts: 4,569
Sorry if I was too harsh. Please accept my apoligies.

As long as you're together there is at least a bit of hope. Many of us our at least partially losing our loved ones to FB or some other website. It's much easier to do nothing and just sit at a screen. Not too rewarding at all and it would drive me crazy. My wife knows she's on a path that has to change when it comes to the virtual garage sites, and Facebook, etc. My wife retired a year ago and both her schedule and energy levels have gotten worse. We used to walk, ride bicycles, play tennis and generally just do more. I'm hoping we'll find thing to do together as we get older and have much more time.
okcnewbie is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-28-2014, 02:49 PM   #23
Senior Member
 
RanCarr's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2011
Posts: 1,910
Quote:
Originally Posted by okcnewbie View Post
Sorry if I was too harsh. Please accept my apoligies.

As long as you're together there is at least a bit of hope. Many of us our at least partially losing our loved ones to FB or some other website. It's much easier to do nothing and just sit at a screen. Not too rewarding at all and it would drive me crazy. My wife knows she's on a path that has to change when it comes to the virtual garage sites, and Facebook, etc. My wife retired a year ago and both her schedule and energy levels have gotten worse. We used to walk, ride bicycles, play tennis and generally just do more. I'm hoping we'll find thing to do together as we get older and have much more time.
No need to apologize.

We all have to find our way through these retirement years. Hitting a few bumps along the way it probably inevitable.
__________________
Retired. RVing with one husband and five cats.
1999 32' Fleetwood Southwind Class-A. Ford V10.
RanCarr is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-29-2014, 04:52 PM   #24
Junior Member
 
Join Date: Oct 2014
Posts: 2
please have his testosterone checked. im new and havent posted. i am a pastor and see this all the time...

this is classic low testosterone... this is just my opinion from life experience. it change my life.. (has nothing to do with the stereo type thinking)

praying
Brother Frankie
BrotherFrank is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply



Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Selling MH - Consignment? TXredfish Class A Motorhome Discussions 7 07-27-2014 11:45 AM
Questions about selling our motorhome iradi8 iRV2.com General Discussion 6 05-26-2014 08:39 PM

» Featured Campgrounds

Reviews provided by


All times are GMT -6. The time now is 01:18 AM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.8 Beta 1
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.