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moisheh · 11-22-2008, 02:22 PM

I have been following the problems with Salmon not being able to spawn due to power damns near Grant's pass. While doing my research I cam across this story.

Eugene Register Guard Nov. 2,2008

May name is Sammy Sam-on. I am an Investigative reporter and spent 3 months writing this story. I first heard about the shortage os Salmon from my friend who woks the fish counter at Safeway. The more I examined the situation the more I realized this was a conspiracy. Every supermarket I went to was out of salmon and kept offering me carp or mackeral as a substitute! YUK. I could not imagine why none of the supermarkets had my favorite fish. One fish monger suggested I contact Green Peace or PETA. There I discovered my first clues. GreenPeace had this big poster with a woman displaying a big smile. She had this huge box in her arms with, you guessed it, salmon ! A closer look at the poster revealed a vanity plate on her car " MONACO MM"
Yup, our very own Monaca Momma has been buying up all the salmon. Green Peace has a reward if you turn her in. PETA is offering money as well, but it is dead or alive!! The Green Peace spokesperson was babbling something about a troll. Keep checking my column for further news on this subject. She has disappeared and no one seems to know where she has gone!!!

S. Sam-on

moisheh · 11-22-2008, 02:22 PM

I have been following the problems with Salmon not being able to spawn due to power damns near Grant's pass. While doing my research I cam across this story.

Eugene Register Guard Nov. 2,2008

May name is Sammy Sam-on. I am an Investigative reporter and spent 3 months writing this story. I first heard about the shortage os Salmon from my friend who woks the fish counter at Safeway. The more I examined the situation the more I realized this was a conspiracy. Every supermarket I went to was out of salmon and kept offering me carp or mackeral as a substitute! YUK. I could not imagine why none of the supermarkets had my favorite fish. One fish monger suggested I contact Green Peace or PETA. There I discovered my first clues. GreenPeace had this big poster with a woman displaying a big smile. She had this huge box in her arms with, you guessed it, salmon ! A closer look at the poster revealed a vanity plate on her car " MONACO MM"
Yup, our very own Monaca Momma has been buying up all the salmon. Green Peace has a reward if you turn her in. PETA is offering money as well, but it is dead or alive!! The Green Peace spokesperson was babbling something about a troll. Keep checking my column for further news on this subject. She has disappeared and no one seems to know where she has gone!!!

S. Sam-on

RonNBama · 11-22-2008, 04:21 PM

I suspected as much! A very similar episode happened here with the annual possum migration. MM was probably instrumental in creating the possum-an-tatters shortage in the deep south!

Toby · 11-23-2008, 01:48 PM

How can we help? Can we expect a shortage in Gator Tail and Armadillos to follow? Have you notice that there are very few road chickens lately? Suspect she may have had something to do with their dissapearance also. (you know the one who peck on the edge of the road and never move when a truck/car passes, they just get their feathers ruffled a little. You never see a dead one on the side of the road--just those old white chickens who fall off the truck. ) s/Toby