Hi Jim! Thanks for validating what I was seeing. I think i've patched it up (for now), details below, but also thanks for recommending possible replacement toilets.
Im not there yet, but I appreciate pointing me to the Dometic 510 - wow, nice toilet! It's the most expensive RV toilet i've seen, and the only one that says it's made for FULL TIMERS right on the title. It's called:
<a href=https://www.etrailer.com/RV-Toilets/Dometic/DOM29FR.html> Dometic 510 Full-Timer RV Toilet - Standard Height - Elongated Seat - White Ceramic
Part Number: DOM29FR </a>
Funny enough the toilet itself cannot be found on Amazon, but its parts are there....weird.... probably the price? The Etrailer.com store seems to have it available, however, go figure....
The patch/fix: i put on the disposable gloves and got in there, took the seal out and looked more closely at the ball and its mechanism from above. Boy, it's gross in there. Anyway, it's all plastic which makes you wonder what's the expected lifecycle on a Dometic toilet. By touching the ball i am able to confirm it just moves on its own, has about 1-2" of play, easy to move it too, doesnt take much. It's basically lose or not tightly coupled to the pedal. That being said, the rubber seal itself was 1yr old, and it had quite a bit of scale/calcium deposits from the hard water on it, surely that didnt help make a tight seal. Also the plastic ball had similar calcium deposits on it which were not visible until the rubber seal was removed. So I grabbed a caulk tool and gently scratched those hard calcium deposits off (again, this was gross, it's calcium mixed with toilet "stuff"). Made sure not to scratch the plastic itself, just enough to get those deposits off. Also hold the tool tight cuz if it drops i'd be hosed. Got it all clean, installed a new seal gasket, lubed the heck out of it with plumber's grease, and done.
Now the ball still shuts about the same as before, it does not close all the way in (because of its lose/play), but it did seal sufficiently to hold water!! Such a relief. From what I can gather this assembly may have 1-2 yrs left on this toilet if I baby it, keep cleaning and lubing the ball & seal. Eventually a new one will be needed, and I hope I can afford the Dometic 510 by then because it looks like the nicest of the bunch.
Thanks for the help & advice Jim!!!