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Old is when...
... what doesn't hurt doesn't work.
... when you get phone calls from younger friends asking for help on antiques...
... you feel like the morning after and you haven't been anywhere.
... 80% of the names in your little black book end in M.D.
... your children begin to look middle aged.
... you look forward to a dull evening.
... your favorite part of the newspaper is "20 Years Ago Today" ... because you remember the events.
... you turn out the lights for economic rather than romantic reasons.
... you sit in a rocking chair and can't get it going.
... your knees buckle, and your belt won't.
... your back goes out more than you do.
... the little old gray haired lady you help across the street is your wife.
... you sink your teeth into a steak, and they stay there.
... you have too much room in the house and not enough in the medicine cabinet.
... you get your exercise acting as a pallbearer for your friends who do exercise.
... you know all the answers, but nobody asks you the right questions.
... you're asleep, but others worry that you're dead.
... you quit trying to hold your stomach in, no matter who walks into the room.
... your best friend is dating someone half his age...and isn't breaking any laws.
... your arms are too short to read the newspaper.
... you know the words to the doctors the elevator music.... because you were at the concerts...
... you would rather go to work than stay home sick.
... you remember gasoline prices that were less than 50 cents per gallon.
... you make an appointment to see the dentist.
... you no longer think of speed limits as a challenge.
... neighbors borrow your tools.
... people call at 9 p.m. and ask, "Did I wake you?"
... you send money to PBS.
... the end of your tie doesn't come anywhere near the top of your pants.
... you wear black socks with sandals.
... you know what the words "pension", investments" and "equity" mean... and wish you'd known 40 years earlier.
... your ears are hairier than your head.
... you have a party and the neighbors don't even realize it.
... when you bend over, you wonder "What else can I do as long as I'm down here?"
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Semi-retired technogeek...electronics / computer / 2-way / ham radio... WA6ILQ (45+years)
1985 Fleetwood 32' Southwind (Chev P30/454/TH400), dubbed "Lazarus" by friends... I resurrected it from the dead...
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