Wife Doesn't Want to Go...

[MrsChilerick]

I travelled all of my business career so traveling for me was never an issue. However, I’d never gone for any long trips. UNTIL, we planners a 5 week cruise to Europe. Here’s what I learned. The tasks required to prepare for a long trip are not much more than for a short trip. Unpacking from a long trip takes no longer than a short trip. Being on a cruise ship and moving from place to place without packing and unpacking was relaxing.

Then we bought our first RV. I was adamant, “I’m not spending all of my time coupled up in a camper” 2 weeks was my limit.

Now, we spend the entire summer in the RV. What changed? We stopped camping all of the time and started traveling. I started viewing the RV as our summer home, rather than a camper. We don’t pack and unpack, the RV is furnished and we have RV clothes that stay in all of the time. I even decorate with art collected your travels. We can take off in just minutes. We share ALL of the chores, just like being home in the S&B.

I have no idea if any of these things will make any difference in your case, but they did in mine.

“Waking up 2000 miles from home in your own bed..... priceless”

[Smokey3214]

Am I the only person who talks to their spouse?

How is this unexpected? How do your plans and dreams not completely overlap?

I just shared this with my wife and she gave me a [ moderator edit] look.

[Laurie22]

I have the opposite problem. We started talking about traveling 40 years ago. I remember it being our dream to travel all over the U.S. once we were retired. I started talking about buying a MH last year because I knew I would be retiring this year. All of a sudden he told me one morning that he had no desire to travel and doesn't ever remember planning it. I was devastated. He told me I could go ahead and travel by myself. The dream included us, not me by myself. So I said ok, let's figure out another dream that we both want to do. A few weeks later he was looking at used MH online! I didn't question it and was happy he changed his mind. We are now the proud owners of a Class A MH! I agreed that I would drive at least half of the time, so I am going to start practicing, get comfortable handling it. I will be the one to clean it inside and out, stock it, purchase everything we need, research trips and places to stay; cook, help set up and tear down. I am willing to compromise and do most everything in order to travel with him at my side. I figure we will have so much fun he will slowly come around and we will become a team. He doesn't want to be gone for months at a time, so we will do short trips and see how it goes. I can't wait for this next adventure. I hope your wife comes around and you two enjoy yourselves. It is a huge change in life to just pick up, leave home and ride off on the highways to places you really dont know much about. Some view this as an adventure and to others it is frightening. That's my story and I and sticking to it. 😁

BTW, what the heck does DW stand for?

[Excesses]

The song by Bobby Goldsboro?

Honey?

And Honey I miss you
But I’m feeling good
I want to be with you
If only I could.....

Sing and hum this for a while.

Just might work.

[NM Nash]

First off, if you and your wife are not accustomed to spending considerable time together it will be about a 3 month adjustment once you live in your RV. Different fears and what ifs, things you didn’t know you could live without, sitting for hours as you travel to your next destination, getting bored crazy, being forced to be outside more and get more active is hard on a lot of folks, retirees included. A lot of prayer may be in order along with careful planning.

If you want to camp host, the beat thing to do is look online at different parks around where you want to stay. Then write a list of questions and call the park. Some places don’t treat their camp hosts well and some value the contribution they make to keeping the park in good running order, some are voluntary positions and some are with pay, some require 20 hrs a weeks some request more, some are in the boonies, some are relatively close to civilization. Do you plan on making repacking yourself where you would need to bring certain tools or should you scope out a few mechanics along the way with good ratings? The questions would depend on what kind of rig you have and how long you want to be there.

As for your wife, I knew of a woman in one park who was an online tutor; that may be something your wife could look into. Or perhaps if your near a town, your wife could set up tutoring at the local library or an after school study hall.

The most important thing on the road is to plan ahead so you both are relatively comfortable and to expect a 3 month living adjustment for the retirement honeymoon. The possibilities are endless.

[Excesses]

BTW, what the heck does DW stand for?[/QUOTE]

DW = Dear Wife

SWMBO = She Who Must Be Obeyed

YCD = Yes Coming Dear

Well, that’s what I’ve been told .........

Cheers

DJ

[Laurie22]

If DW = Dear Wife then DH = Dear Husband?

[thecg]

As a wife, I have a feeling there is something she doesn’t want to be away from ... maybe grandkids or there’s too much work involved in three weeks... only she knows and you need to ask her. If she goes on short trips it would imply to me that she does like rving. You’ve gotten a lot of great advice and I think find out what’s holding her back. You cannot over come her objection if you don’t know what it is...If she never wanted to RV for more than four days that would have been good to know earlier on. I know there were suggestions made by hubbies that you should go it alone... but I know my hubby loves me being in the rig with him and being his co pilot... handing him snacks and sharing the ride. It’s not always about the final destination but the journey along the way.

[Ron750]

My wife and I live apart during the week because of our jobs. I look forward to our weekends. In two years I am going to retire, and she will still be working. I will take trips apart, but not more than one week.

I always wanted an RV but my wife didn’t want one. So I forgot about it. Years later she decided she’s interested in RVing so I joined this forum. If it turns out she doesn’t like it, I’ll drop it.

I find solo trips on my motorcycle are a great adventure, so I’ll do most of my solo trips on my bike, or if I need to take my dog, a car.

So I wouldn’t worry about a divorce from taking a separate vacation. I would worry about a divorce from pressuring your wife into doing something she resents doing.

[GaryKD]

Hi rver98,
I leave my wife home. Sounds cruel but it's her decision. She fly's to meet me when she wants to. Stays as long as she wants and fly's back. When exploring, not having to take into consideration what she will do for the day frees me up to really enjoy everything. Everybody is happy.

[rvschmuck]

Originally Posted by rver98

I need a little advise here. Hopefully sincere rather than jokes. I recently retired and it has always been my dream to travel and explore in the RV. My wife still works part time as a teacher and gets the summers off. It's like pulling teeth to get her to go away on a two or three week trip. We do go on weekend trips during the year, however I want to go on longer trips, like we did when the kids were younger.

What are your thoughts, suggestions, etc.?

Thanks

You're retired; she isn't. You want to travel; she doesn't. Until you understand the why's behind both of these...

[ItalGerBrit]

Originally Posted by GaryKD

Hi rver98,
I leave my wife home. Sounds cruel but it's her decision. She fly's to meet me when she wants to. Stays as long as she wants and fly's back. When exploring, not having to take into consideration what she will do for the day frees me up to really enjoy everything. Everybody is happy.

Same here. My wife hates being "trapped" or "kidnapped" in the RV and I love being out on the road so I go alone. I dropped her off at airports more than once to "escape". She still flies a lot but not to be picked up and "trapped" in the RV. She hated the RV. Fair enough. I always hated going to parties. Like GaryKD said, "everybody is happy".

[busybee]

Originally Posted by rver98

I need a little advise here. Hopefully sincere rather than jokes. I recently retired and it has always been my dream to travel and explore in the RV. My wife still works part time as a teacher and gets the summers off. It's like pulling teeth to get her to go away on a two or three week trip. We do go on weekend trips during the year, however I want to go on longer trips, like we did when the kids were younger.

What are your thoughts, suggestions, etc.?

Thanks

-----------------------------------

If I were you, I would find out what exactly your wife does not like about it and then break the arguments down one by one. She might have only one big argument or several...there is always a compromise.

[vmlm]

Ask your wife what you should do. If she says go alone. You can try it and probably not be happy without her. All life long dreams need to be readjusted or given up on for life long happiness. Good luck and enjoy the trips you do take together.