I would stay around 3,000lbs if you have a Highlander advertised to tow 5,000lbs.
I had a Honda Ridgeline advertised to tow 5,000lbs and it could not control a 4,500lb travel trailer once I got to 60mph. The Ridgeline had a 122" wheelbase was the problem. I traded the Ridgeline on a 145" wheelbase vehicle and it was night and day. I could tow that trailer at 72mph comfortably.
I would think a T@B, Little Guy Maxx, A-Liner or most bigger pop-ups would be fine. You only have a V6 engine so less than 3,000lbs would be better yet.
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