Community Forums

B Bob · 12-04-2010, 09:38 PM

The sad truth is that if you did anything to them you would likely go to jail and they would stand outside laughing at you. IMHO the farther you get from LA in the west the better peoples behavior gets. We live 120 miles to the south. As soon as we can sell our house we are escaping from S Cal.

Wanabee FTer · 12-04-2010, 09:45 PM

I agree Bob, but I am not waiting to sell the house, we are looking for tenants.
My wife's friend and co-worker was killed a few days ago. Too many crazies out here.

Midniteoyl · 12-04-2010, 10:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Wanabee FTer

I agree Bob, but I am not waiting to sell the house, we are looking for tenants.
My wife's friend and co-worker was killed a few days ago. Too many crazies out here.

That sux..

bakerkids · 12-05-2010, 12:21 PM

I am the mother of 3 teens. Well actually two are now in college and turning 20 and 21. The youngest is now 18. However, over the years I was labelled as "too strict" by some of the other parents in our small community. We live in a town of around 5,000. Until my kids move out, they're required to be home by 11 p.m. on weekends and 10 p.m. weeknights. If they're at the home of a responsible parent (that I determine to be responsible), they can stay later. Sometimes the youth group will meet at a home and play board games, and that's an exception.

I've been asked at times to attend meetings to support a kid who "has been treated unfairly" by those in authority. I won't do it. Little Johnny needs to learn a lesson, fair or not. Life isn't fair. If the parents arrive to fix the problem then the lesson goes unlearned. So sad for many of these kids that the parents are robbing them of valuable lessons.

As I look back, the kids who had parents less strict, or those that challenged authority in the kids' behalf, are living a life of trouble. I know, I work in the court system..where, again, we treat them with a slap on the hand and a send-off of "don't do it anymore."

CD · 12-05-2010, 01:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bakerkids

I am the mother of 3 teens. Well actually two are now in college and turning 20 and 21. The youngest is now 18. However, over the years I was labelled as "too strict" by some of the other parents in our small community. We live in a town of around 5,000. Until my kids move out, they're required to be home by 11 p.m. on weekends and 10 p.m. weeknights. If they're at the home of a responsible parent (that I determine to be responsible), they can stay later. Sometimes the youth group will meet at a home and play board games, and that's an exception.

I've been asked at times to attend meetings to support a kid who "has been treated unfairly" by those in authority. I won't do it. Little Johnny needs to learn a lesson, fair or not. Life isn't fair. If the parents arrive to fix the problem then the lesson goes unlearned. So sad for many of these kids that the parents are robbing them of valuable lessons.

As I look back, the kids who had parents less strict, or those that challenged authority in the kids' behalf, are living a life of trouble. I know, I work in the court system..where, again, we treat them with a slap on the hand and a send-off of "don't do it anymore."

GOOD for you. We need a lot of you out there.

StStg1 · 12-05-2010, 01:18 PM

Here are my thoughts. First report the vandilisim to the police. Second, press charges and testify in court. Third, ask that the punishment should be that something that the perps (or their parents) own be tagged just like your property was tagged and then have the perps clean it up or pay to have it cleand or repaired. A little payback might be a lesson learned.

Wanabee FTer · 12-05-2010, 01:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bakerkids

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As I look back, the kids who had parents less strict, or those that challenged authority in the kids' behalf, are living a life of trouble. I know, I work in the court system..where, again, we treat them with a slap on the hand and a send-off of "don't do it anymore."

I know many families that are not in the word "to strict", but on the other hand they are not jellyfish either. There are many ways to instill morals for your kids. Staying together as a family is a great start. Letting your kids know they are loved and encouraging them to do well helps their self confidence.
I believe the problem is more of a social class issue. The "have nots" that have grown up in the poor side of town believe there is no possible way to change their lives. Fathers leave the family early on, kids grow up fatherless and the mothers are overwhelmed with life. IMHO there is no loving guidance in most of these families, only bitterness and resentment. The kids go out into life with no guidance and look for people that will accept them as they are. This is where the gangs come in. The kids feel like they have a family inside of the gangs. Even though they are a very dysfunctional family, they bond together. When a different gang is nearby they feel threatened, and defend themselves or become the aggressor.
This problem seems to be getting worse by the minute. Gangs are growing larger and larger at a frightening rate. It's getting to the point where we as a society need to look into this problem ASAP, or there wont be anyplace left you can go without running into it.

R1Kirby · 12-05-2010, 02:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by wa8yxm

In days of old when kids got bold and did things they should not do
The wood shed was where they went to chat and get come-uppens too.

But alas, today you give the brat what he deserves and it's "Hello Judge, No, I do not feel I abused my child.. I was mearly punishing him for wrongdoing" and time in jail for child abuse.

THAT, is the problem.

Of course, given enough time the brat turns 18, and gets to talk to that judge himself.... Then he can join his old man in jail.

And the fact that you can not discipline a kid is exactly why we have the problems we do today.

RickO · 12-05-2010, 06:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by R1Kirby

And the fact that you can not discipline a kid is exactly why we have the problems we do today.

Not sure I buy this as the root of the problem. I think we still CAN discipline our kids... we just don't.

Too much of this stuff starts with things like no longer keeping score in pee wee soccer and giving everyone a trophy at the end of each season instead of just those who "won" them.

The world just don't work this way and it sets kids up for a rude awakening, and I for one am very concerned that we as a country are headed for class warfare because of it. And the band played on......

Rick