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Old 12-11-2020, 08:23 AM   #225
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Old 12-11-2020, 09:14 AM   #226
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From my Scottish grandfather;

Assumption is the Mother of All Foul-ups.

Golf is just chasing a ball around the park. It is a game for men that can't chase the lasses anymore.
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Old 12-11-2020, 09:25 AM   #227
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Thoughts to Ponder

Do twins ever realize that one of them is unplanned?

What if my dog only brings back my ball because he thinks I like throwing it?

If poison expires, is it more poisonous or is it no longer poisonous?

Which letter is silent in the word "Scent," the S or the C?

Why is the letter W, in English, called double U? Shouldn't it be called double V?

Maybe oxygen is slowly killing you and It just takes 75-100 years to fully work.

Every time you clean something, you just make something else dirty.

The word "swims" upside-down is still "swims".

Intentionally losing a game of rock, paper, scissors is just as hard as trying to win.

100 years ago everyone owned a horse and only the rich had cars. Today everyone has cars and only the rich own horses.

Your future self is watching you right now through memories.

The doctors that told Stephen Hawking he had two years to live in 1953 are probably dead.

If you replace "W" with "T" in "What, Where and When", you get the answer to each of them.

Many animals probably need glasses, but nobody knows it.

If you rip a hole in a net, there are actually fewer holes in it than there were before.

If 2/2/22 falls on a Tuesday, we'll just call it "2's Day". (It does fall on a Tuesday)

100 years ago a Twenty Dollar bill and a Twenty Dollar gold piece were interchangeable. Either one would buy a new suit, new shoes and a night on the town. The Twenty Dollar gold piece will still do that.
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Old 12-11-2020, 09:31 AM   #228
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Old 12-11-2020, 11:07 AM   #229
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Old 12-11-2020, 11:13 AM   #230
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Originally Posted by Miamicamper View Post
Why is it called ĎHuman Resourcesí? Of course itís for Humans. Do companies have cow resources? Dinosaur resources?
Ask a rancher? Cow resources? Yep.
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Old 12-11-2020, 11:30 AM   #231
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Wisdom from Will Rodgers:

And a bunch about growing older ...
First ~***** Eventually you will reach a point when you stop lying about your age and start bragging about it.
Second ~ The older we get, the fewer things seem worth waiting in line for.
Third ~*** Some people try to turn back their odometers.* Not me.* I want people to know 'why' I look this way.* * * * * **
Fourth ~ When you are dissatisfied and would like to go back to your youth, think of algebra .
Fifth ~**** You know you are getting old when everything either dries up or leaks.
Sixth ~**** I don't know how I got over the hill without getting to the top.
Seventh ~ One of the many things no one tells you about ageing is that itís such a nice change from being young.
Eight ~**** One must wait until evening to see how splendid the day has been.
Ninth ~*** Being young is beautiful, but being old is comfortable and relaxed.
Tenth ~**** Long ago, when men cursed and beat the ground with sticks, it was called witchcraft.* Today it's called golf.
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Old 12-11-2020, 11:33 AM   #232
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Some more of Will Rogers sayings to ponder:

1.** Never slap a man who's chewing tobacco.
2.** Never kick a cow chip on a hot day.
3.** There are two theories to arguing with a woman. Neither works.
4.** Never miss a good chance to shut up.
5.** Always drink upstream from the herd.
6.** If you find yourself in a hole, stop digging.
7.** The quickest way to double your money is to fold it and put it back into your pocket.
8.** There are three kinds of men:
****** The ones that learn by reading.
****** The few who learn by observation.
****** The rest of them have to pee on the electric fence and find out for themselves.
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Old 12-11-2020, 11:34 AM   #233
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Originally Posted by Radioranger View Post
Ask a rancher? Cow resources? Yep.


Ohhh, so the cows get vacation time? Insurance benefits? Paid time off? I didnít realize
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Old 12-11-2020, 12:03 PM   #234
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If poison expires, is it more poisonous or is it no longer poisonous?

I was thinking about this just last week. I wanted to poison some gophers and the only gopher bait I had was about 10 years old. That very thought went thru my mind.

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Old 12-11-2020, 02:13 PM   #235
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Old 12-11-2020, 02:25 PM   #236
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What happens if I'm scared half to death twice?
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Old 12-11-2020, 03:30 PM   #237
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Couple things I've learned.......
-We live in a world of illusions. There's a lot of things out there that are not quite what they seem to be.
-Time is more valuable than all the diamonds in the world. You can't manufacture it, you can't reuse it. As it passes, it's gone forever. Tick Tock..............
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Old 12-11-2020, 04:03 PM   #238
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