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Old 10-17-2011, 08:28 AM   #1
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Fleetwood Owners Club
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Location: Granite Falls, NC
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The living room ''topper'' third try...

Third attempt on the slide topper.

I went back out to the coach yesterday afternoon, climbed the ladder for a look around at my situation. I took along my big vice grips with the red handle, a hammer and a long punch, some WD40, some silicon spray, silver tape, and a beer and a Slim Jim. I opened a beer and ripped out a Slim Jim and took a big bite and a long sip of beer and ''contemplated'' the situation.
Hummmmmmmm? I need to install the ''topper'' in the grove on the roller and the grove on the side of the coach. Hummmmmm? I sat down my beer and my Slim Jim on the roof of the coach and went down and got the '''topper''. Mind you, this topper is about 20 feet long and about four or five feet wide and it is kinda stiff to say the least. It has a ''rough side and a smooth side'' and I called the ''topper guy'' to see which side went UP, toward the sky when it was installed properly. He said the slick side toward Heaven. I folded the thing and kinda wadded it up and wrestled it to the top of the ladder. I dumped the thing on top of the coach and turned my beer over which puked its self all over the roof of the coach and the beer and my Slim Jim slid off the roof and hit the ground. I said SHUX....... I rushed down the ladder to ''save the Slim Jim from my neighbors dog'' and we had a tug of war over the treat and I came in second. I got the piece about three inches long without much dirt on it. He ran away dragging the two foot treat in his mouth. (I hate that dog) I said SHUX real loud........
I went back in the coach and got another beer and another Slim Jim and a stripe of Elk Jerky, (spicy) and headed back out. Up the ladder and on top of the coach I kinda wadded the topper up in a pile and I took the Slim Jim out of the pack and taped one end of it to the AC cover making it lose proof now. I folded the Elk Jerky (spicy) and crammed it in my hip pocket and opened the beer. I had gotten the old topper out of the groves and it was on the ground so it was out of the way. I took the silicon spray and soaked down the groves on the roller and the side of the coach getting silicon on my hands of course. I also got the silicone all over the metal roof of the slide out room making it slick as a skating rink. (lovely) I wiped my hands on my shirt but that didnt help much. I reached for my beer and it popped out of my hand like wet soap. The beer kinda spun around on the roof and started foaming and it kinda shot off the roof like a rocket, leaving a trail of suds along the top of the coach for about three feet before it did a ''deep six'' over the side of the coach roof emptying its self on the side of the coach. I said SHUX AND DARN REAL LOUD.........
I started back down the ladder for more beer and, too late, I realized that when I walked on the metal roof of the room I was getting silicone on my shoes. Two steps down the ladder my right shoe slid off the rung and I almost castrated myself on the side of the ladder as I did a ''Fireman's slide'' down the side of the ladder to the ground. I managed to land in a puddle of beer which kinda softened my fall just a tiny bit but it didn't help the pain when the ladder fell on my head. The neighbors dog stood watching and waging his tail with about 6 inches of my old Slim Jim sticking out of his mouth. He look like some guy with a cigar needing a ''lite''. I guess he figured I had dropped another Slim Jim.
I managed to get to my feet and I backed up to be sure all my stuff was still on the roof of the coach, (except me of course). Yep, the Slim Jim was still taped to the AC unit cover, all the tools were there and the can of silicone and the WD40 and the ''topper'' lay wadded up on the roof. As I stood there contemplating my next move, when mother Nature solved the problem of the ''topper on the roof''. In her wisdom she ''puffed'' a breeze and it floated down to the ground like a butter fly on the wing. I wadded it up and stuck it in a compartment, opened the Elk Jerky (spicy) and headed into the house.
''What the hay are you tracking on my kitchen floor?''
'' I dont know, it could be silicone spray stiff''
'' I thought you were gonna' fix that slide topper thingie today.''
'' Naah, I just did a ''look around'' to see what else I need to finish the job''
'' We got any beer in here. I am all out in the coach''...................

More later on this. We just might leave off the toppers and get a big umbrella to do the job.......

You will never understand Vets until you have served .They are special people that see the world thru the eyes of a person that has, at one time or another, put his or her life on the line for this country FOR YOU while you lay warm and safe in your bed, at home...... Until you have slept in the mud or puked in the ocean or seen the world from 30 thousand feet up with no place to hide or heard the ''ping of sonar'' on the hull of your ''sub'' while you hid in a thermal layer under a millions tons of ocean or landed a 50 million jet on a pitching deck at night with no lights or SERVED THIS NATION IN SOME MANNER BESIDES CHEATING ON YOUR TAXES.... DONT JUDGE THE VETS TOO HARD AND BE A LITTLE FORGIVING WHEN THEY GET A LITTLE OUT OF LINE. (think about it).(some of us died for you, what have you done for us lately)..........
nuff said for now
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Old 10-17-2011, 12:15 PM   #2
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SHUX but this is funny!
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Old 10-17-2011, 12:24 PM   #3
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You just can't make up real life. Wow.
2005 Winnie Adventurer 37B ,
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Old 10-17-2011, 08:41 PM   #4
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Not the beer

Every weekend I have the same issue. It takes a twelve pack to drink a six pack. Every time I turn around SHUX DANG MOTHER OF MY CHILDREN... Knocked it over again. By the time I get to the bottom it is all flat.

But you have earned the right. No a civilian will never understand the bond and respect. And they will never appreciate the true sweetness of a cold beer when you have been caked in earth (sand, mud, swamp...) or crusted from cover to boot with sea spray.
2010 Damon Daybreak 3204 Sport, bunkhouse with Jeep Wrangler toad.

Improvise, adapt and overcome... "Semper Fi"
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