Wife not sure

[Mrmberg]

Full time RV living isn’t for everyone and most people will tell you to try it out before selling your house because it could be a costly mistake.
There is something for everyone and what is good for one may not be good for another but form your own opinion

[MrGoodwrench]

Originally Posted by Snufy1

My wife is unsure about going fulltime. She says she has read on Facebook a lot of post from women who have gone fulltime and don't like it.
I was hoping to get some feedback from some of the wives.

I know I’m not one of the “wives” you’re seeking an answer from, but I can provide an answer, speaking from my wife’s point of view.

We’re sort of an anomaly, since we’ve been together for 47 years, and married for 46 of them, always thoroughly enjoying our time together. Part of the early success of our relationship may have been the 20 years I spent on active duty in the U.S. Navy as a shipboard Machinist’s Mate (absence makes the heart grow fonder??). But I digress...

Our first full-time experience was the 6 years we spent living in a 24’ travel trailer, following the ship up and down the east coast from Newport, RI to Pensacola, FL. The only reason we gave that up was due to being transferred to CA and unable to find a nice place to park it... Otherwise, we LOVED the experience, cramped up in that small space with one very small bed (other side converted to storage).

Upon my retirement, and disgust with civilian employers, we decided to get rid of all our possessions and move into an ‘88 34’ Pace Arrow, traveling coast-to-coast, including Canada and Mexico for 11 years (In mid 2001, 120K overloaded miles made the Ford big-block very tired, so we bought a house and tried that again).

After LOTS of “hobbies”, businesses, and 10 years with the Federal Government, the latest chapter has us again full-timing, but this time in a 40’ Phaeton

Bottom line, if you and your spouse TRULY enjoy your life together, living in essentially the same room all the time, like to travel, enjoy a certain degree of uncertainty, full-timing can be a rewarding experience. By the same token, if one of you is only happy watching old western movies in your “man cave”, and the other is constantly fretting over not being around their kids/grandkids 24/7, don’t even consider it.

Our most recent discussion regarding full-time motor home living occurred while still living in our 3K SF, 4 level townhome in MD. I just mentioned “how about we full-time again after I retire in July?” Her response “You find me a motor home big enough, and nice enough, I’ll do it”. Only took us a week or so to find the right one, we sold the home, all our possessions (third time for us-LOL), and spent spent my last 4 months on the job, living in the coach, commuting to my office 10 days a month and teleworking the rest...

My wife and I still see no issues with being gypsies and members of the “semi-affluent street people” club. Been doing it off and on from our mid 20’s to early ‘70’s now, with no incentive to get trapped in another cage, with the same neighbors, same restaurants, same boring scenery, etc, etc...

[disccopy]

We full timed/lived in our 30' Island Bed Lazy Daze for 5 years with our cat. Loved it! Situations changed & we unfortunately needed to move back into a house, and sold the RV. We had traveled over 140K miles in the years we had it. Not all were full timing. There were many years when we traveled for a few months to then return to our home. We may have done that a few times a year. If I had my way we would again be full timers, but my husbands health precludes that. We now just travel & camp with our cat in our conversion van.
Whatever you decide enjoy!

[Harry043]

rofl - My wife asked me, "Can you imagine you and I in an RV 24/7?" I thought about that, bought a new truck, bought a little toy hauler, and left her. That was 10 years ago, I have been full timing ever since. Oh yeah, met my new wife along the way, we have been together on the road for 9 years, I have never been happier, I think I can say the same for my wife. But, I have always done things a little differently - I retired when I was 56, I don't have a ton of money, but if you measure wealth in freedom, I am very wealthy!

[LandCruise68]

Well we sold our home three years ago to help our single parent, older son with our grandson. Long story short, he remarried, but we are still dwelling in his basement...it's a very nice basement, though. We are going to try to "snowbird" at Gulf Shores this winter...will be gone October through February...time will tell how that goes. Just using our 5er as much as possible before we get too old...also to give the "upstairs" folks some privacy/space. Not sure we would full-time; only if they kick us out!

[tomur2]

My husband and I finally - after many years of trips during work vacations - went full-timing. That was in 1992, when he retired and our youngest joined the military. We finally landed 5 years ago. We missed 2 states to drive through (Hawaii doesn't count to us), we missed 3 Provinces of Canada, toured over 3/4 of the states of Mexico and worked a caravan to Panama City, Panama, seeing all the Central American countries except Belieze. We loved visiting many places and exploring. We found there is always beautiful places and didn't choose one favorite, as tomorrow might be 'the one'. We are Best Friends and tried staying in small campers prior to full-timing to see if we could handle it, the answer was YES after spending 4 days of continuous rain while in an RV. We did not keep the same rig all the time - slides came out and I fell in love. I think we have had every kind of RV there is out there except a diesel.
We were on a limited budget and didn't take a lot of 'extra expensive trips' but we sure enjoyed all the time we had together. We just spent the last summer in an RV. My husband, at 87, could not renew his driver's license due to inability to read the signs until he is under them. I know we will miss RVing even just summers to visit kids and grandkids but life goes on and it's on to the next adventure.
Try RVing and find out if you want to set goals, if that's your thing, or just sit down and discuss what ideas you each have for the next stage in life. Communication is the biggest key to getting along and enjoying each other's time and ways of enjoying life. Enjoy and remember, you get back what you give. We love meeting people and seeing new places.

[AbdRahim]

Lots of great advice here. Try before you buy. I don't think I could full-time. However, I have no trouble staying out for several months at a time. The other side is when on a long trip and something happens at home that requires my attention. This means lost camping time if I have to travel all the way back home and back to the campground.

By the way, my wife does not like RVing, and I love it. Every year, I have to plan at least one stay within her driving distance. She visits for a week or two and she has had enough.

[philnail]

My wife of 42 years says this is the best thing we could have done. When living in a small confinement and you become more closer which is what we have done. Amazing life would never go back to a house. Great neighbors everywhere we go. We live in a 2013 Entegra Anthem with an outdoor bbq built on the back of the coach.

Life is to short to be living it inside a house

[wintertree]

Full time RV living is not for everyone....however for those not attached to "stuff"..those wanting to have good weather most of the time....explorers....those that love breaking free from routine....full time RV living can be very liberating...Missing Friends and family...one of the most common excuses I hear over and over...Most full timers will tell you they have never had so many good friends....and family either visits...or we head back sometime thru the year to get caught up with family...
RV advice....find a rig with enough room for both of you....a floor plan you both like....and destinations that hold interests for both parties
We have a large well equipped 5th wheel that we both consider "home"...we also have a truck camper that we load on our dually when we do weekend explorations....over night trips....or boon docking off the beaten track....But the icing on the cake is when we finally launched our 44' trawler on the west coast of Canada (after 3 years of re-fit)....we now have three places we can live....none are "sticks and Bricks".....Cheaper ?...not really...freedom ? most definitely !
We have never had so much fun....seen so many wonderful sites....made so many good friends....Assisted living may be the next time we actually settle down....and hopefully that is a ways off.!...Good luck with your plans...

[Pine Cone]

My wife and I are not full timers but have enjoyed spending 4 to 6 months (several times 6 months in one trip) on the road for the past 27 years. Just returned this week from a 4 month trip covering 5,000 plus miles in the motorhome. We have found that we like to spend a week at the location we visit and travel out in the toad from there.

Pine Cone
35 ft. Open Raod with Malibu toad

[NanaW]

Originally Posted by Snufy1

My wife is unsure about going fulltime. She says she has read on Facebook a lot of post from women who have gone fulltime and don't like it.
I was hoping to get some feedback from some of the wives.

I wasn’t sure either so we go 6 mths and home 6mths now I’m loving the freedom even more so we may sell house and go 12mths 😂

[Banning406]

This is one wife who’s loving the RV full time on the road! We’re just getting started, have family all over North America and we’re the only ones with time to go visit so on the road we are going! My parents are elderly and not able to travel much anymore, our kids and grandkids are from Canada to Costa Rica, friends and cousins on the east and west coasts and Vancouver Island. We sold the ranch that was keeping us tied down after the last two long winters of plowing!

My parents were part time RVers and had a lot of great adventures, and sometime we will probably want a little cabin somewhere by a creek, but for the next few years, bring on the sunsets and sunrises in new places!

I’ve actually been checking out the Encore and Thousand Trails memberships to possibly plan our year keeping out of the really cold weather. There are sure some fun places and people out there as I am thrilled to be getting out there!

My favorite quote by Helen Keller - “Security is a superstition....it doesn’t exist for the sons of man.... life is a daring adventure or nothing at all!”

[twogypsies]

Originally Posted by StageCoachDr

Couple of things to keep in mind.

1) If one has medical issues and needs frequent health professional appointments, or drug prescription renewals, it may not be right for you unless you plan to use your current residence as a home base. Neighbor of mine had a medical issue and she could not have navigated around an RV for 6 - 8 weeks while she healed. They returned home for the surgery and recoup period.

Medical issues can certainly be done while in a RV. If you need frequent dr. appts. then you just stay there for a couple months. In fact, it's a lot easier in a small space. We dealt with cancer, joint replacements and various other surgeries. Physical therapy can come to your RV. For full-timers there's no problem getting medications renewed. You can easily have prescriptions transferred from one place to another by using WalMart, Walgreens, CVS, Target, and even mail order, etc. We've met full-timers who are on dialysis, have no legs, arms, heart conditions, etc. Sometimes one is perfectly healthy but the other has issues such as sight, dementia, etc. The healthy one just does more work but then, it would be the same if living in a house. Believe me, full-timers can deal with anything.

Your #2: The thousands and thousands of full-timers out there do banking. We never had an issue using our mail forwarding address. We used Wells Fargo, Bank of America, Fidelity and Vanguard.

[imnprsd]

This subject reminds me of a few things that might resonate with you and the masses:

In 1998 we decided to sell the house in San Jose, CA and move to Austin, TX where my wife's parents moved the year before. We bought a brand new 36' Southwind RV with 1 slide-out, and I felt a great load had just been lifted off my shoulders. (Along with $3,500 mortgage, not including taxes.)

We both were professionals in the tech industry and we both quit our jobs to spend 3 months on the road, and we took each day as it came. (The summer in the PNW is unbeatable!) I was 39 and my wife was 35... no debt... money in the bank... and the open road out in front. We also never had this much time to ourselves; and ever since I decided 2-weeks vacation is for the birds! 4 weeks is so much better, And now 4 months/yr is what I need.

...But back to the points I want to make: There we were, 2 hours into our trip, right there... crossing the Golden Gate... I looked at my wife with glee and pronounced "Isn't this great! We're homeless and what a beautiful day it is!"

...To which I looked over at my wife and she just started crying. (I felt so insensitive.)

...But our trip progressed. We had no choice, and it was memorable in every respect. We saw a mountain lion crossing the highway into Oregon; friends in Washington; rolling wheat laden hills for as far as the eye can see on our way to Montana Flathead Lake; Mt. Rushmore; Yellowstone wild life; Black Hills; Bad Lands; rodeos; Colorado; Carlsbad Caverns; and not a single breakdown or repair. The trip was memorable and we all enjoyed "a chance in a life time as a family." Those are some of my most precious memories!

Later we took off to the beaches of Texas and camped right on the beach in Port Aransas (where I still return every year to this day). We took the family to Disney World in Florida; the Florida Keys; visited family; discovered New Orleans; and more. We visited Civil War cities and did all the tourist things we could possibly do.

... That is to say: I was doing want I wanted to do, and I thought my wife was enjoying herself two. (No so much I later found out.)

You see, it's like one author said: "Women marry men thinking they will change, but they don't... And men marry women think they won't change, but they do."

So as I read all the previous comments; my reply to the OP is this: Maybe your wife is letting you know she has different priorities than you; and if you guilt her into going you better prepare yourself for some serious passive aggressive behavior along the way. Sure it's one thing to be gone 1-4 weeks, but "Home" is not necessarily where the heart is. And when you are out on the road and do not have a "home" waiting for you when you get back... it feels endless at times. And sometimes that feeling messes with our "programming" and flies in the face of responsible behavior. Alternatively, if "full timing" is your only path, that sometimes makes the decision easier, because it can be cheaper to "full time it," but it's harder that way than you think. (For example, just wait until you run out of water. Or your AC breaks down... which can be dangerous if you are in the summer heat.)

If you never heard of Maslow's Triangle or Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs then you might want to google it and see what matters most to some and what drives others. (See picture below.)

So, I think if you make her go "camping" with you.... maybe so you can live out your dreams (everything from fishing to just feeling like a drifter); then man, I think you either don't belief in or don't care about this mantra: "Happy Wife. Happy Life."

I'm 62 now and I travel 4-5 months every year in my 40' triple-slide diesel, and I feel like a million bucks out on the road. ...But here's the thing. I'm single and I divorced my Ex ~18 years ago; in part because no one straighten my thinking out back then. And know this: You are never too old to get divorced!

As for me, I miss my Ex sometimes on Saturday and most Sundays, but not so much Monday - Friday. And what I know for sure is that "glamping" and "full timing in an RV" was not in her DNA.

As for "camping" ...I don't even want to do that anymore, but I loved camping when I was young, and so I still love the outdoors now! Because that's in my DNA.

I'm on my 3rd motor home (post divorce) and I travel about 10,000 miles a year living the dream and seeing the beautiful USA.

Might I suggest this as my closing statement on how to have a good time if you plan to do some traveling either by yourself or with your wife:

You don't so much as need a plan... You need a "common goal" and/or a "gimmick" (as I like to call it).

For example, you both might want to visit all the major art museums in the USA; or make it a goal to visit all the National Parks. Something you both want to do is key! And you have to have fun; and be flexible, tolerant, and understanding.

My gimmick Last season was this: I made it a point to visit major jazz clubs in all the major cities and I had a blast discovering jazz history and upscale jazz clubs. I also loved looking at the architecture found in these east coast cities; and whenever possible I got in a horse and carriage and let the driver give me a tour. (At night usually, because I like the city lights!)

Here's the thing: If you (both) consider touring the USA in an RV is a a "step-up" or an "opportunity of a lifetime," then you both will share some wonderful memories and your travels will invigorate your soul and your marriage.

Or... the road will consume you from within if you don't agree on where to go and what to do.

It also helps if both CAN take whatever "the road" throws at you! ...Because believe me, if you are not realistic, capable, prepared, and able to make good decisions when visits townships; or when your RV breaks down... and it will; well then, just maybe, your wife might know you better than you know yourself?

That's my two cents. And good luck to you and to all of us who travel the highways and byways of this beautiful country -- full of beauty and unknowns.